a conversation without words...

Adventures in Pottyland

2012-02-27T19:31:00.000-08:00

I must admit this venture started much earlier than I expected. I don't think I thought it would happen for another year...

Last summer the kids in Jack daycare were all learning about the potty, about average age of 3, he would watch them all learn and came home squatting on pots and buckets making peeing noises. We thought it was silly, and so early (18 mos) but had read to act on potty training when your child is showing interest in the potty and that a child comfortable with the potty as a familiar object in the home is more likely to use it easier. So with a random trip to ikea one day I picked up 2 el cheapo' $2.99 potty's to throw in each bathroom. I thought, even if he never touched it, at the very least i have lost 6$. This way if he was interested that he can play with them or whatever he wanted. It lived in the living room for some time, a good bucket for cars and snacks and became one of his toys.. a lime green potty in the living room, what a conversation starter.. lol. He would fake pee complete with peeing noises and lots of naked potty sitting while watching tv, putting it on his head and soon enough even his animal friends were beginning to use the potty too, Original Dirty Dog, the imposter, # 3 and Blue, Winnie the Pooh and Mickey Mouse, they all looved to use the potty and would often find them sitting on the pottys in the house. We talked to him a lot about the potty, let him come into the bathroom to see that we all use the potty. Mommy and daddy and talked to him about Amma and Papa and Aunties and Uncles, we ALL use the potty. Most recently my niece has been learning so this was even more great exposure.

It wasn't until past November that on my Birthday he gave me the gift of a poopoo in the potty! While he was having some naked diaperless time (which we would do each morning for a few hours), He on his own, went to the potty! I was so amazed, so proud, and totally shocked!! With lots of praise we took the potty out of bathroom and brought it to live in the living room. A month went by with very little interest it wasn't until Christmas eve that he decided would be a great time to peepee! wowow waayy to go!! January became a blur of hit and misses, many floor clean ups and great successes! But with a no pressure approach he seems to be more interested than when if we would force him to sit on the potty to go. He figured out his own way, trying for a while doing it like daddy and standing up leaning against the wall, (lol!) trying to aim, sitting down, learning when to control pee, how to controll and learn when its coming and when its too late ("mommy, i pee... i wet"). It is still a process but it seems to be coming along. Its been a few weeks now of steady peeing everyday at least once in the potty!

Last week we were at my brother and sister in laws and saw they have a sticker wall, where my niece gets a sticker for every peepee or poopoo in the potty. I thought it was a great idea and decided to do out own version of the sticker wall but it would become a mighty potty of stickers! where we place the stickers on the potty! Once we started this the peepees and poopoos started flowing! He was so happy to recieve stickers that he could put on his very own potty! We have had 3 days now of 3 and 4 pees or poos in the potty PER DAY!!! One day he only used 1 diaper! 1 pee! dang that's freak'n awesome!!! I am so proud!

We are still in the process but I am proud to say I think we are on the way and he is getting it! the mornings are consistently going pee and poop right up until his nap at 1pm. He gets excited when he goes, has a big smile on his face and yells "PEEEPEEE COMING!!!" right before he has to go. He is so excited to show us and take his pee and poo to the toilet and flush it down and wave and yell "BYEBYE POOPOO!" His proud little face smiling up at us and picks and collects his sticker and places it carefully on his potty. I think this has to be the most joyful potty training I have ever encountered. no pressure, just the pure joy of him wanting to do it on his own. I love it! I'm not holding my breath but it would be great if he got it by the time the baby came. I think it is us now that it has to really change our habits too. Its easy at home but taking him out, making sure we ask him if he has to go and really listen when he tells us. I am loving the stress free potty and loving that he is establishing such independence. 2 years old and 1 months, Mommy and Daddy are SO proud of you! Way to go little man!

A Gift of Blessing

2012-02-19T10:13:00.000-08:00

A while back I was asked to commission some paintings for some parents as gifts to their kids. I must say, this was the most touching, personal commission I have done in a while, if ever. I think this gift is beautiful. The parents wrote letters, prophetic and encouraging words and blessings over each of their four girls. So unique and personal, it was just simply beautiful. I cried while painting them, so lost in worship, so overcome by the presence of God, the love that these parents have for their girls and love that I have for my own son and little miss or mr on their way. I incorporated their names and the letters written by each parent and painted in worship to listen to what God was showing me about each of them and what they and their name meant to Him also and were expressed visually on canvas. The importance of a name. Wow. the one you choose for your tiny person when they are born that has so much to say about who they are and who God has called them to be. There is SO much in a name.

This seemed to be a work in progress, first the parents writing of the letters then me waiting in the timing to paint them, waiting on the right moment in worship to paint them with Jesus, and I'm so glad I waited. Doing this forced just wouldn't have turned out the same. I think this is an amazing gift a parent can give their child, something personal, from them, that expresses their heart, and deep love for them individually and press in really deep into that little spirit, the love and security and blessing.

If you are interested in commissioning a similar project please email me at sinnott07@gmail.com.

Day 23: Part 2: Chronicles of a toddler and his big boy bed.

2012-02-15T17:28:00.000-08:00

I am happy to report today went smoothly. After a volunteered nap this afternoon and sleeping for 2 hours (much better than it could have been but still not the 3 hours I want back) and peeing and pooping on the potty all by himself. I had hope. This evening, he peed on the potty AGAIN all by himself and after stories, hugs and kisses, he cuddled up in his toddler bed on his own and went to sleep. no fight, no fury, just sleep. Thank you Jesus, may this insanity be coming to an end..

Day 23: Chronicles of a toddler and his big boy bed...

2012-02-15T08:50:00.000-08:00

Today my son peed and pooed in the potty all by himself, unassisted, unprompted. just got up from playing and sat down on the potty and went, and continued on playing like that is just what you do.. ummmmm.....?!???!!! then about 1/2 hour ago found his soother, said "night night mommy", climbed the stairs and made his way into his BIG boy bed, and asked to read books. after he climbed back out and climbed into his open crib/toddler bed and went to sleep...

uhhh... this is a change.... first.. HOW PROUD AM I? second... WHO'S CHILD IS THIS?

Dear Jesus, please let this be the beginning of some easier transitioning. It has been nearly a month, I would love for him to just choose on his own that this is his new bed and that he wants to sleep in it. It would be great if it were not to be so hard anymore. also, the easy potty training is a great bonus. THANK YOU FOR GRACE TODAY.

Seasons of Change

2012-02-10T08:20:00.000-08:00

The past week has been such a crazy one, it feels like the 2nd half of pregnancy just whizzes by. I can't believe I'm nearly 23 weeks! Where as the last month gone!?

The past few days I have been wanting a new start. Fresh, spring hopefully approaching, (common willy! we right this time!!) Preparation for my little one, knowing we are staying in our house for a bit gives me the new desire and jump to paint the walls fresh, organize and dump the junk! I seem to go through this every year. A big cleansing of the house and my mind and my heart. I want to get organized, live organized and prepared. Fresh paint throughout that is CLEAN and BRIGHT! some new rooms will be under contruction soon for all of us which Luke will be building very soon. My brain is busy at work preparing them, putting details together and not knowing what or who little miss or mr has put a bit of curiosity and caution into designing the nursery. Its interesting to try to plan a beautiful room for a boy or girl.. Luke is almost done his MBA. 3 weeks of his LAST class and about 7 weeks of his thesis. He has been working so hard the past 2 years and now it is finally coming to a close. It really is the start of a new chapter.

I am feeling more optimistic this morning. just feeling so strong in everything in me shouting, FRESH START. Luke feels the same way, he said he would like to take a shovel to our house, throw it all out and start again. The house feels so cluttered and messy. I need to get this under control. When I try to pinpoint just one area of the house, I can't seem to, it feels like every area needs a big clean up! The art studio is a DISASTER. I have to say at this point I almost feel ready to throw it all out or give it all away. I have no space. Clutter and disorganization really messes with my head. Mind you I'm not the tidiest person, I wish I was but I get tired and lazy and often don't put things in the right places, forget where I leave most things and leave piles that i have been working on all over the place. It drives my husband crazy, and myself too really, I'm not sure why I can't just PUT THINGS AWAY. I like to collect things that I see can be something or used for something. I like to turn them to something new. I have a hard time throwing things out. Luke says I have a tad bit tendency of hoarder in there. I deny it of course but when I begin to see things build up without a place or ongoing piles I can't help but wonder.. eep... I can make up excuses but really when it comes down to it I just need to throw things away. Today I got rid of a garbage bag of clothes. A bag on hand-me-downs of maternity clothes that were mostly s and xs they didn't fit so I past them along. It felt good. Get the junk out! This week I put all my clothes away. I know sounds funny but I am the one with the heap of clothes so high I often can't get to my bed easily (i feel like i have written this post before). Luke's side is perfect looking, mine is insanity. I took out all the ones that don't fit and put them away in a chest until baby is here, then I can switch them all back over again. next will be the stack and I mean stack maybe 30" tall on my bedside table, of books! i don't know how I collect so many there but I do... and magazines that collect beside, under and all around my bed... i need to just TOSS. I have just decided I'm going up with a big garbage bag and cleaning out the crap.

Funny though usually during these times I get major parallels in my own life that need clean up, so perhaps God starts to talk to me about them then. The past 6 months to a year around the house we have been patching things up. I think of the floors, the back splash, preparing the walls, some unfinished projects. It has also been a season away from Church and even friends. Perhaps its been a season of quiet healing, preparation. and all this time while we patched sanded and smoothed the walls, all they wait for is paint. I see more nails popping, more holes that need to be fixed, maybe its time for a big once over and see what else needs to be done before i repaint. I'm tired of the cover up and want perfect walls in my own life.. Just like my home, its time to see what I knew my life was inteded to be and step up and make it happen... Yes this is a season of mommihood, resting and growing, raising my babies but in my identity, myself, my heart, with Jesus, step into who he has really made me to be rather than living with patchy covered up walls.

I recently bought the new bethel cd the loft sessions and i have pretty much been absorbing and marinating in it and His presence since I bought it. I have actually been motivated to go to church and seek out more of him. To listen, to absorb, to take it all in. I am noticing a difference.

My mom recently talked to me about finishing projects you alway intended to do or just finish what you started and maybe then God releases something new. I have all these ideas swarming in my heart and mind over the years and for whatever reason never get carried out. I think its time. I feel good today. I think its time to start cleaning up and ready for our new chapter and fresh start.

Day 17: FED UP Chronicles of a toddler and his bog boy bed...

2012-02-09T11:01:00.000-08:00

Day 17: Ok. I am loosing it. so far past mad now that I am at a loss. Last night we travelled 1 h back and forth to bed, today at nap he is still up, it is 2:00 and his bed is 12. I thought this was suppose to get easier? better? that at some point he would get it? Last night so tired of this shit we put a door knob safety protector thing on, so that when we close the door, he can't get out. I felt a bit bad, the pressure gate idea didn't work, he kicks it down, close the door, he opens it, patiently we walk him back hoping at one point he will just go to sleep but it is so tiring and such a fight, he doesn't seem to be getting it. Last night he eventually did go down, by choice and not upset. Today he ASKED to go to bed, i put him to nap and he has been screwing around ever since. After 1 h of back and forth I have shut the door. door protector handle thing on, he can't get out to wander. He SHOULD get the hint right?

I absolutely have no idea what to do. i have kept he same routine, we have been consistent, we have been patient, we have been persistent, we do everything that we are "suppose to do" that teaches a kid to indepently sleep on their own (which he NEVER has had a problem with), he should, he can, but won't make the decision to sleep. I am so upset that my once amazing sleeper, easiest kid to put to bed, 15 h solid through the night, 2x 2 -3 h nap a day baby, has turned into a 10h a night of disturbed sleep, sleeper that wakes up frequently and through the morning, with 1x 1.5h (if that) a night sleeper...... I hate it.

People tell me he will settle, he will get it, he will go back to normal. For now all I know is I am exhausted, NEED the break and don't have a clue what I'm going to do when the new baby comes around.... Oh Jesus, please have this change soon. I can't much longer..

Living with Hands wide open.

2012-02-07T13:33:00.000-08:00

Trust...

I live my life believing and knowing that God is in control of it. He guides our paths, gives us direction on decisions, and Luke and I have been given good discernment for a reason.. He protects and warns us from bad decisions and when we ask for a clear answer b/c we really don't know either way He is faithful to show us. I trust Him and know that He has the ultimate plan and knows what is best for me, my husband and family, and our life. Over the years He has proven himself over and over showing us how he orchestrates every move and decision (even when they are hard) but that that he works that all things are worked together for our good.

Trust is a funny thing. Its living open, willing, flexible, secure... We have lived with hands wide open, holding things loosely, knowing that He is in control. That He knows way more than I do, so I should probably just trust Him with what He feels is best for my life. But Trust can be a hard place, it can feel disappointing at times, feeling like the dreams you have are not happening, or not understanding timing or why something that may seem so perfect doesn't work out. But the beauty of Trust is knowing that even though what you feel is perfect or right, God might have a different plan, something even better in store and knowing that and really believing that even when things feel like they aren't working out that there is a design, a plan and and a purpose as to why and it is because He has a better plan than we could ever create for ourselves..

This said, right now I am trying to hold onto and remember this all.

We have a little townhouse that we are quickly busting out of at the seams in. It has been the never ending quest to find a new house. The market is so insane here, prices are through the roof and even for the tiniest detached home start at $400,000. House hunting has been depressing, feeling like we are never going to find anything. That is until this weekend.... Where a last minute showing gave us hope. We walked in and melted. I mean I was a puddle on the floor in love with everything we have ever dreamed of in a home. Wow, THIS is God. He has finally brought us to our home. We have found it, the search is over.11 foot ceilings, gorgeous old heritage home with original old moldings and intricate door handles and air vents, locks you open with skeleton keys, a stunning cascading staircase, and original wood floors throughout, french doors, large doorways, with upgraded stunning kitchen with granite counters and stainless steel appliances, a big yard with lounging deck space, exposed inside brick (g'aaahhhh love) a 3rd floor massive studio for art and photography, lots of space, just about 2300 sq feet of perfection. BUT it was a semi and had no garage, we were ok with that. We had never even considered a semi. As we walked through the room we fell more and more in love every room more perfect than the next. As we sat in the living room, we felt peace, we felt home. Finally this is it. Exactly what God intended for us all along. We loved it so much we came back with my inlaws for a 2nd look in the afternoon. We knew, we decided, we are making an offer. When leaving we sat in the car and prayed over the house, "father, we love this house, it is perfect for us, if this is you, let this all come together easily and fall into place."

We had a couple months back found a home we loved and tried and tried to buy but it was so much stress and so hard, and such a fight that we knew it wasn't suppose to be this hard, That it wasn't our home. We hoped this time things would be different, and sure enough within the next hour things started to fall into place, the financing approval, the down payment, possible renters for our current place (we wanted to keep both of our homes and rent out our current one), things just felt right. We informed our agent that we wanted to put an offer in. So he came to the house put everything together ready to go but they weren't receiving offers until Monday at 7pm so we registered the offer but wouldn't go into negotiations until Monday. I prayed again. "if its ours, let us get it. " (and I think a little consciously, without saying felt if its ours let no other offers come in) Sunday came and I left Luke at home to study and went to church with Jack. I asked Jeremy my father in law what he thought of the house, he said that he had mixed feelings. I was confused by this b/c we had felt nothing but positive. He said "the inside feels just right, totally perfect but the area, the street, what it backs onto doesn't feel quite right..... But that's just my opinion.." I wanted to see what he meant, see that, b/c maybe I was missing something. So when I got home, I picked up Luke and we went for a drive. There were a couple of quirky things like there is a parks in rec center at the end of the street, and a couple of tiny homes but nothing that would cause me to not buy the house. We decided to look up and down the streets and to see the surrounding neighborhood all beautiful homes and mature trees, just stunning... until we came across a funny little street behind it. As we drove onto what did not seem like a street but muddy grass, there are 5 dumpy houses and no driveways, just cars parked on the grass, a broken chain link fence and greeted by 3 sharp faces that looked like homeless, crack addicts and their pit bull tied up with a yellow nylon rope. It honestly felt like we were driving into the slums, I have never in my life felt like that or seen that, especially anywhere near my home. wow. something changed. I suddenly wasn't sure. We talked about it and both had mixed feelings. We called the police, did some research and found out that there was nothing really wrong with the street, not a higher crime rate or anything just a poor street amongst moderate to wealthy homes. The police said "that's just what you get in the downtown of a city, a mix of everything.." we went home thinking, praying, trying to get an answer. We saw what they were seeing, but thought if our children aren't in danger and it is just poor amongst a good area i think we are OK with that, its no worse that where we live now (as there is some gov housing close to us, but no problems).. We decided continued forward still feeling this is our home. We prayed specifically, "God if this is not our home, show us a clear NO, and stop this all before it starts." All night I was up, dreaming, envisioning our life there, our new home. We have a really great agent, and we knew that he would get us this house. We woke up the next day and found out there was another offer and that we would be a bidding war. We felt confident in our agent, knowing he would get us this place and that everything has worked so smoothly God had to be all over this. if it is ours, we will get it. The day went on and I kept thinking about the house, the area, the street behind it, asking questions, finding out as much info as I can. Luke and I still talking, praying asking God to give us a real straight answer. At about 3pm Luke emailed me to inform me of some interesting possible changes happening that would effect our entire life as we know it.. (Without getting into it,) creating a great risk and uncertainty to our future, that could lead to it being a very stupid decision to purchase a house when we have no clue what is about to happen in our life.. Luke felt torn, stressed unsure what to do but it was so clear to me, this is our No. We have prayed for a very clear answer and this is it. Timing in an amazing thing and with timing like that You can't not listen.. After giving it more thought and prayer, Luke also having a hard time coming to that, knew it was right. wow. our home.... our perfect, beautiful, what we thought was right, what we thought was ours, what we thought was God home... is not our home.. HIS timing is perfect, and we have to trust Him with that. We were told what we were told to stop us from making a wrong decision. I don't know why this place was so perfect, or why we felt so much peace or why things all lined up so perfectly for it not to be ours. Maybe it was to show us something, to show us our heart of what we really love, desire and where we are ok to compromise (like it being a semi). Maybe it is a test to see if we are listening to even warning signs. Does he have to shout NOOOOO in your face in an audible voice or is He subtly showing you and you have the decision to choose to or choose not to see.

Letting go.... This is hard for us to let go. not just for us and this house, but I think for all of us. Let going of your dreams that you think are right for you, or what you think they look like. I believe God places desires in our hearts but sometimes his vision of it is much different than ours. I think His version of ~~our~~ His vision often isn't what we think, and can look like something we didn't expect. But you know what? His way is even better in the end. He not only wants to meet our needs and give us our hearts desire but he wants to surprise us with the largest and even the smallest things that make it even better. I remember when we found our townhouse, we went through something similar to this, even purchasing another house, and it falling apart, we were crushed. When we were fed up and not looking anymore our current home came as a surprise. We loved everything about it, it actually was perfect for us in every way at the time. We bought in the winter we moved in the spring, excited and full of Joy we moved in on the weekend that the Sand-cherry tree in backyard was in full blossom and gorgeous french lilacs bloomed and filled our house with their beautiful aroma (we had no idea they were even in the back yard and for anyone that knows these 2 they don't have long bloom periods, or even blooming periods that happen at the same time of year). He had orchestrated them to happen at the same time, that very weekend to speak to my heart. I had never told anyone that these were my 2 favourite, that I would love these in my garden, that they make me smile, that their scent fills my heart but God knew and wanted to show me that he was listening and that he knows me more than anyone, and that this was all part of His plan. He not only wanted to give what we want, need, love, but surprise me and remind me how special I am to Him.

I am reminded of a song i cannot get enough of right now, it sits with me downloading into my heart.
Love came down, by Brian Johnson

If my heart is overwhelmed and I cannot hear Your voice
I’ll hold on to what is true though I cannot see
If the storms of life they come and the road ahead gets steep
I will lift these hands in faith
I will believe

I remind myself of all that You’ve done
And the life I have because Your Son

Love came down and rescued me
Love came down and set me free
I am Yours I am forever Yours
Mountain high or valley low
I sing out remind my soul
That I am Yours I am forever Yours

When my heart is filled with hope
and every promise comes my way
When I feel Your hands of grace rest upon me

Staying desperate for You God
Staying humbled at Your feet
I will lift these hands and praise
I will believe

I remind myself of all that You’ve done
And the life I have because Your Son

Love came down and rescued me
Love came down and set me free
I am Yours I am forever Yours
Mountain high or valley low
I sing out remind my soul
That I am Yours I am forever Yours

I am Yours
I am Yours
All my days
I am Yours

I am Yours, I'm Yours forever

It somehow gives me peace and comfort, like a big warm hug surrounding you. knowing I am His, he is watching out for me, protecting me, guiding my paths. His timing and plan and purpose and design are perfect the way He has designed them. He has my perfect house, he has it all worked out, and is taking care of us. We can't rush his timing and His plan for us is better than I could ever create for myself. I just have to trust..

Day:...... uggghhh what day are we on? Chronicles of a Toddler and his big boy bed..

2012-02-06T07:57:00.000-08:00

I must admit I have lost track of time and not really sure what day we are on... I think 14? We are somewhere around the 2 weeks mark. It has been a blur of up and down, middle of the night and early wake ups, exhaustion, sickness, just a tough situation all around. But we are moving forward. Jack hasn't been showing interest in the Biiiig Bed for a couple of days but has preferred the toddler bed/crib. I think he feels safe in the toddler bed/crib, its cozy and what he is used to. I still have 4 - 5 months to get him completely out of there so I don't think I am too worried.

The process of changing beds has been interesting, challenging, and a real test in understanding how to establish boundaries with a 2 year old, strong willed, little person and stretch and push for us to learn to be good parents that are loving but in control. It has been a stand off of the battle of the wills at times (as he is very stubborn like his mommy) and the most enjoyable experience at others. (Like Saturday night when he told us night night and went upstairs and put himself to bed, or all the times he snuggles up so tight and goes down so easily.) For the first time I have felt since he was born, 'wow, THIS is what parenting is really about. This baby stuff is nothing, I really haven't seen any thing yet, THIS is what makes your skin thicker.' lol.

So we continue on our journey. The challenge at the moment doesn't seem to be going down, it is staying down. We have a touch of a night wanderer (which his mommy was, my mom once found me on top of the fridge curled up asleep at his age), and though the upstairs is locked up he can't go to far, he hasn't figured out how long to stay in bed yet. Prior to this if he woke in the middle of the night he would roll around in his crib then go back to sleep. But now b/c he can get out, he gets out! So we get 4:30, the 5:30, then 6:30 then 7:30 up. As in to say 'Is it time yet?' So the returning him to bed, tell him "its still nighttime little man", kiss him on the head and tuck him back in is frequent in our house at the moment. I still feel we should be putting the pressure gate up each night, for him to start to get the hint on his own. I'm sure it will come, I'm just hoping that he settles and goes back to his long naps and great night time sleep habits.

insanity, Day 12

2012-02-03T10:03:00.000-08:00

Today is a good day but it feels like insanity. My little man has had a stuffy nose and for those following, graduating to big boy bed, testing his limits, and ours... lol. He woke up this morning, bright and early. (what is with the 5:30 am!!) its kind of killing us as the last what should be 2 hours of our sleep is waking with a small person and consistently putting him back to sleep will 7:30 with 15 min intervals of sleep ourselves. It takes 28 days to create or break a habit. I'm hoping the habit he creates is not getting in and out of bed starting at 5:30 am.

Today is insanity. Little man has just gone down and i am exhausted! yesyerday I spent all day alone editing a recent wedding (post coming soon!) and I need to just recoup and relax. Jack and I have had a blast this morning, but in the last hour i just haven't been able to keep up. i made french toast stars and hearts with bananas and strawberries this morning, and then had a morning of colouring, hotwheels, playing cars, reading, tickling, jumping, all the things I love to do. But when it comes to nap times which used to be so easy it has felt very hard lately. I'm tired and baby is growing and getting bigger, taking more energy from me and I am actually feeling myself run out but the time nap rolls around. Like I need a nap myself. Today he went down easy, seemed to want to nap in his crib but at night wants to sleep in the big bed. That's fine with me, whatever is good with him. He got up once asking where his pillow was, I found it and asked him to get in bed, he got in on his own, i put the covers on his and he laid down and went to sleep. I sit here just zonked! I want to take a shower, feel clean and refreshed but want to sleep and be lazy and watch last nights episode of Greys. I know there is a lot of work for me that needs to be done but I just need a break.

As i look around the house looks in shambles, I have been nursing a sick baby to health, trying to fight a cold myself, the dog got spayed 2 days ago and trying to keep her calm is a full time job so she doesn't rip her stitches open and just cleaning and picking up over and over the same things I just can't keep up. Today I think I will just let the tornado of insanity take over and surrender.

Day 10: Chronicles of toddler and his new big boy bed..

2012-02-01T07:42:00.000-08:00

Day 10: Thank God Jack did sleep the night last night we all needed it. This morning was an early start, 6:15 am he woke up. Little did i know that every morning that he wakes this early and Luke puts him right back to bed. He sleeps for another hour and then gets up. I thought Luke had left already for the morning as our ~~little~~ puppy is getting spayed today and he was driving her in. when Jack woke up he sounded so awake, not cranky but wanted downstairs and didn't want any part of climbing into bed with me so I could catch some more zzz's. Grumpily (I am not a morning person) I stumbled downstairs to find Luke standing in the kitchen, keeping the dog quiet hoping that Jack would go down and had a sippy ready me milk to give to our little guy. He told me i should put him right back into bed, but now I'd lost my window of oppertunity and he was already watching toopy and binoo in our bed.

So a bit of a rough start for me, I hate getting up super early it seems to set me on the wrong path for the day and poor little guy, a rough start for him too, sinuses are full on pouring out of his face, eyes are dripping and had a fever last night. He stayed quiet this morning just wanting to watch tv and snuggle, but started to show signs of exhaustion very early, getting frustrated and crying, having fits over nothing, whining and finally I just decided he needs to go down, he's tired and sick. poor guy. Nap today is a success, no fight, just sleep, but I would be the same if i weren't feeling well too. Now for me to wake up and finally get out of this morning funk!

Day 8 & 9: Chronicles of toddler and his new big boy b...

2012-01-31T17:21:00.000-08:00

Day 8: what seemed to be a smooth easy bedtime, I was relieved, seeing as I haven't been sleeping well lately and this whole change over with earlier wake ups, painful put downs and shorter naps is really draining the only energy I have. I rest in bed and read a magazine to fall asleep and finally around 12am I can feel my body giving up so I turn off my light and close my eyes for some much needed rest. I crash in out bed but after a quick random, strange and disturbing dream I find myself wide awake. uggghhhh go to sleeep!!! finally as I'm drifting out again, i hear thump, bump bump bump. our little man made his way out of bed at 12:30am. Luke so wonderfully got up and put him back to bed. then 15 min later, thump, bump bump bump, oh jeez. are we going to finally have THAT night..? and so began the series of up and down for the next 3 hours, the 2 of of swapping together. persistence and patience. persistence and patience... finally at 3am, knowing that Luke had to get SOME sleep, I went took him back to bed one last time and decided to stay in his room in the 2nd bed on the floor b/c the problem was is that you could tell he was trying to sleep. He would go down for 15- 20 minutes then be complaining and get up crying about wanting to go night night, something was bothering him. He has cut 3 of his 2 year old molars in the last 10 days and I think he is working on the last one. i wasn't sure what was up but he wasn't being defiant, and I felt compassion, I know what a pain it is when your body thinks that the beginning of your sleep was just a nap and then you are stuck wide awake all night. So at first i tried to snuggle into the bed on the floor with him, maybe he would be able to fall asleep in my arms but he cried. "maaaammmmmyyy, i seep, niight niight (he whimpered), big bed." (what he refers to as his bed since we changed over to big boy bed). So I put him in his bed, turned on more worship music, snuggled him in with his blankee and laid down and pet his back and head for a while. I laid back down on the floor bed and began to pray over him while I laid there, over his sleep and protection over his dreams and that he just settles and rests. It stuck, it was 3:30am we had finally had our last up. That is until 6 am when poor little guy woke up in a fright crying. His sleep was disturbed all night (well all 2.5 hours past), up and down, whimpering not sleeping well, so there wasn't much sleep for him and not any for me. Wow i felt like absolute ass. It can't be time to wake up yet. Luke came to help knowing I'd been up all night with him and told me to go to our room. He took Jack and put him back to sleep and let me sleep till he was leaving for work. What a wonderful husband i have. And I turned out to be right, something was wrong with little man, he sinuses are all backed up today and had a low grade fever. poor little guy must not have been feeling great.

You know I forgot all nighters, it has been so long since Jack woke up in the night even once that I realize how much baby # 2 night feedings will wipe the floor with me at first until my body gets used to it again. Today I just couldn't get it together after that. I was a weepy mess and on my way driving in an unfamiliar area, I got pulled over by a cop as i didn't know I was driving in a 50 zone. I haven't had a ticket in nearly 10 years. I burst out crying, a total mess, I was exhausted, overwhelmed, late for my appt, upset for this ticket b/c we are totally broke, and unknown to me it was community zone which meant double the fines. He told me it was nearly a 300$ ticket and 4 points. I didn't know I was speeding, I was driving 75. I sputtered out in my tears some kind of plea of mercy, what a horrible last 12 hours it had been and I really didn't know I was speeding, I thought it was 70. He left checked my record etc and came back, and had mercy for me, he told me to try to relax, was kind and he was only giving me a min fine of 10 over, no points and a 65$ ticket (poor cop probably had no idea what to do with an emotional, exhausted, pregnant woman, full out weeping in front of his face). I thanked him for not crucifying me and drove off.

Exhaustion is an interesting thing. I have been running on empty for a while but with sleep I can balance all the business of my life, projects I have to do or commitments I have made, chasing after a busy toddler, growing a baby and somewhat manage these insane hormones that have come along with this pregnancy all with a mostly level head. but without sleep i am a blubbering mess that is instantly hopeless and drowning. I'm not even sure where I'm going with this I'm just getting it out b/c I need to get it out. All i know is I need God. In the times I feel like that, he is he only one that can make me feel better and remind me I am strong.... Something I remembered 3 hours later after bawling all day. I am Strong. even when I feel weaker than I have ever felt. there is a warrior in there.
Oh please God, help me when #2 comes.

Day 9: Naptime: I was hopeful when Jack fell asleep in the car after our dr appt.. drove home he'd been asleep for nearly 45 min, I knew I could be screwed but there was no keeping him awake any longer, he was as exhausted as me. I prayed for more grace. He transferred well and slept for an other 1h45min when we got home. enough time for me to tidy, prep dinner and rest.

Day 9: Bedtime: he goes down with ease and has been sleeping for almost 1 h. Please God have mercy on us. Let him sleep through the night and wake up at 8 am.

Day 7: Chronicles of toddler and his new big boy bed..

2012-01-29T18:25:00.000-08:00

Day 7: This morning little man was up, quiet as a mouse he snuck into our room and climbed into our bed at 6:45am. He was so cute trying to be quiet but dying to talk to us and get love and hugs and snuggles and wanting to play. I must say, i am loving this new wake up. it sure beats the alarm clock.

Today the afternoon nap happened in the car due to church running late... so we couldn't test out the usual afternoon insanity that nap time has become. This evening he was so tired from a short nap that he just collapsed in bed 1/2 hour before bedtime and didn't even want to read books. Ahh little man, you are so sweet.

Whats inside mommy's tummy?

2012-01-28T09:27:00.000-08:00

Cutest book. My mom purchased in a little shop in Orangeville called "Nurtured" if you haven't been there check it out, or join their fb page. Mommies with #2 on the way, this is a great little book to explain what is going on in Momm'y tummy!

Day 6: Chronicles of toddler and his new big boy bed..

2012-01-28T09:14:00.000-08:00

Day 6... but only day 3 for nap time. Night time we seemed to have conquered, he doesn't even try to make up excuses or get out, he just goes to sleep. But nap time on the other hand seems to be tough..
I think the problem lies in that I work part time. So 1/2 the time he is with me and the other 1/2 he is at a sitter. There haven't been enough consistent days with us for him to know that nap time you go to sleep with out a fight and you sleep in the bed! as soon as he starts to get it, the next day he is somewhere else. So there is not a consistent routine there that he knows he can rely on. This morning he woke up something awful like 6:30, uggh, and woke up once last night. We tried having quiet time in our bed, we tried just letting him wander upstairs, and turn on the lights dim in his room so he could play but nope, uggh he just wanted downstairs, while shaking the gate and crying/complaining at the stairs Luke let me sleep and got up with him.

Luke is in his last course of his MBA so after a while down he went to do his work while I played with jack, but with such an early rise he was just out of sorts and didn't know what he wanted. Crying and fussy I decided even though it was earlier than normal and hoping to push him till 1 to go for a nap so I know he'd go down smooth again, by 11 am I knew it was already time. So off we went with the regular routine, brought him up to read stories in mommy's bed and i was open to him perking up and us playing longer he just started to get worse, so by the 10th book and up and down the stairs for milk, then waffles, then noodles, then cheese, which he threw all on the floor and didn't really want. We finished one last book and headed to bed. Out came the water works, upset about everything and bed and soother and blankets and dog and nothing was right for him. I tried to calm him down but nothing would work. I find when I'm exhausted (was up till 1:30, then awaken by jack at 2:30 then again at 6/6:30 and growing a baby and not sleeping well at all) I just have a shorter fuse on patience. After the 7th out of bed and returning him, I could hear Luke downstairs and asked him to help. So then it still continued. The boy that goes donw so easy for his daddy did the same thing he had been doing to mommy, back luke with patience cont to return him to bed. After a short but LONG 10 minutes Jack gave up and climbed into bed himself and went to sleep.

So we are still on our way, hopefully he will get it soon. I know patience and persistence are key. I hope nap times get better, well they are getting better but I hope they are as good and bedtime soon enough and that he starts to nap as long as he was when he was in the crib. We seemed to have shortened to 2h instead of the great 3 - 3.5 h we were getting every day. Which right now just doesn't seem like enough of a break, but its better than nothing. anyway, off reorganize my closet. In great need of a dejunk in my life.

Day 5: Chronicles of toddler and his new big boy bed..

2012-01-27T17:51:00.001-08:00

no drama, just sleep.

saaaawwwweeeeeeeettt.

Day 4: Chronicles of toddler and his new big boy bed..

2012-01-26T11:14:00.000-08:00

Last night went very smoothly, I went out with some some girlfriends for some "drinks" and Luke put him down the bed, he said he only got out once and Luke sent him back, he didn't wake up after that, just slept right through and woke up this morning at 7:15 sharp!

Day 4: Nap Time #2... Well yesterday was so hard that I was sure it couldn't get much worse. After a morning of playing and taking him around to stores, getting some new shoes, and lunch at "Donalds" he came home to the expected naptime.. i tried a slightly different approach instead of just putting him down at the regular time, between 12 - 12:30 I waited till I knew he would be really tired (hoping he would just crash and not argue) and put him to bed at 1. It took him a bit of convincing to get there and fussy time during reading books, but after he realized he was indeed going to bed no negotiations, he sat down, read a book in my arms, I put him in his bed, gave him his dirty dogs, and soother, put his blankee on and rubbed his belly. He got sleepy, out I went and in under 10 minutes I was done, he didn't try to come out and just went to sleep. I'm so glad this time was easier. I hope that he settles into this quickly. I love that he loves to sleep and always has been so good at it. Unfortunately about 20 min after he went to sleep, he started to stir, woke up and began to cry. I wondered if i just leave him, he might go back down, as this what i would have done before when he was in the crib... I think it worked. He is quiet now, so I think he is sleeping. He hasn't tried to escape, he hasn't come to the door and he hasn't made any excuses. Just went to sleep.

Night Time: dang it the kid just read books and went to sleep. no fight, no fuss. sweet dreams sweetie!

2 years old!!!

2012-01-25T21:18:00.000-08:00

My little baby is growing up. I can't believe how much he has grown, how smart and hilarious he is, and how much joy he brings us. He is amazing. Every night we creep to his room and just stare at him, smiling like goofy kids at christmas over their great present. He is so big now, nearly filling his bed, wow, where did the time go? It doesn't feel long ago at all that I was holding him in my arms as a newborn snuggling him so tight.

A friend of mine recently asked me to photograph her daughters first birthday. What stood out to me were the details, she created the most incredible environment for this party and it got my wheels turning for my own little man. It was his birthday on Saturday, he is 2. I can't believe it! We threw him a Birthday Party for him on Saturday, nothing big just a few close friends and their babies and our family. I couldn't think of a more perfect theme than Sesame Street b/c Jack Loves it! He knows all the characters and talks about them all the time, last night he even woke up from a dream talking about Ernie and Bert and Big Bird, it was adorable.. I knew that even though it was going to be a small party i wanted to do all in the details!! After weeks of crafting, cutting, making ernie and berts and cookie monsters, flags, cutting hundreds of circles (which was actually a stress reliever) lots of creative gathering of thoughts it all came together and I must say I am pretty proud. He was so happy when he came down that morning, he talked all about the decorations and balloons and ernie and bert and elmo! All those hours were totally worth it, just to see the smile on his face. Many sweet new things happened this weekend, just to name a couple, when asked how old he is he yells, "I TWOO" and holds out his forefinger and thumb, he sang Happy Birthday to the piano in key so soft and so sweet as he played along hitting the keys with grandma (we have never heard him sing a whole song before, it was adorable), he asked all weekend to sing skiminarinkeedinkeedink, row row row your boat, the wheels on the bus and head and shoulders (with all the actions), and after much climbing in and out of the crib he is very proud of his new big boy bed we gave him last night, able to get in and out on his own. He is such a sweet little guy. I love to watch him grow even though I'm sad when I pack away each new item of clothing that doesn't fit him. You are the best. Happy Birthday my little man!!!

Tickles in the morning!

he woke up to a living room of balloons! he loved them, what fun!

Oscar - the garbage man (not the grouch, heehee)

some details... numbers confetti on tables

sesame street party isn't complete without bert and ernie! this was some fun cutting and pasting, I make a number of characters just by cutting out shapes from construction paper and pasting them together like this!

loot bags, thanks for coming!

I saw this on a blog for sesame street party so cute, had to do it too, what a great idea for a snack for kids!

and so I made some monster cookies too.

just to add a little colour to the table, pilsner glasses of jellybeans!

my cute little guy opening presents withe daddy

he was very excited about this bowling set.

and how can an artist mommy resist from buying her little boy who loves to draw and paint his very first easle.

Happy Birthday Jack, Love Elmo!

these took too long to skewer each one but they looked great.

my mom piped the letters of each kids name on their own cookie, and of course elmo is a must.

being tickled :) what a cutie, he had a lot of fun, playing and laughing, he is so great.


i wish my dinner table has this many yummy things on it every day.

my cutie, wandering amongst the madness.

and how great are these!? Cookie monster and elmo cupcakes, I piped these all, my cookie monsters started to melt but were still cute, my elmos came out great and kept their shape. I loved them and so did the kids.

the cupcake tower

everytone enjoying the toys

and Jack's very own 'Dorothy' just like Elmo has, a gift form his Auntie Carrie and Uncle Matt.

my little 2 year old man. He moves so much its often hard to get a picture of him. Here Daddy is giving him a massage" (jack comes up to you and asks you for a massage and when you massage his shoulders he laughs uncontrollably) what a sweetie.


good day, good friends. i had made all these little flags and hung them throughout the house.

ohhhh present time, Lots of Thomas the Train, he LOVES trains.

just eating some elmo cupckes. jack ate one "eye" and decided he didn't want it anymore. ha!

being silly on the stairs

my cute little nephew Devin.


welcoming at the front door as you come in!

hundred of handcut and sewn flags and circles, that was A LOT of work, but well worth it.


heehee just love these cupcakes!

Happy Birthday my little special guy. You are the best!

Day 3: Chronicles of toddler and his new big boy bed..

2012-01-25T11:18:00.000-08:00

Nap time.. well the past 2 nights have been fairly successful, i was quite happy. Well then we reached today.. NAP TIME. The past 2 days I have been at work, so since our little switch over Jack has been and daycare napping in his playpen as usual. Until this point there has been no attempts to nap in the new big boy bed. So I with hope, I followed our regular routine, and off to bed he went. No more than min later he was out. So I then returned him back to bed. 30 seconds later, he is out. I return him again. and again and again and again and again and again for 1 hour and 35 minutes. So this is my afternoon, babysitting a freak'n door waiting for a small person to walk out of it. I have come to terms with that but this in and out of the bed and screaming and fits and flailing and crying, tears and excuses, I finally can relate to this book now.

I felt like when he was a newborn playing 'pass the baby' with my husband just to attempt to keep our insanity while he cried and cried. But this time, i am alone. it is all up to me to not scream at him, burst out crying or break something. I continue to ask God for peace and stay strong because I know that it has gone on so long that if i give in, he wins. and he will do it ALL OVER AGAIN. and with time it is really wearing me down, i am loosing patience and about to freak and right when I am about to loose my shit, he comes to the door one last time, i angrily i try not to show it but storm him back to his bed put him in and say "good night!" he looks at me and sits up, I say with desperation "no jack, its night night time" he cries, "MOMMMMMMMY!!!! .......BLAAANNNKET" (which doesn't mean he needs one, there is one in his crib, but it means he WANTS TO BE TUCKED IN NOW!! It registers to me very quickly, blanket!! HOLY CRAP blanket! FINALLY!!!! OOOHHHH GLORIOUS BLANKET!! I HAVE WON!!!!!!!!!)

He sweetly lies down, I cover him with his favourite blanket. and he goes to sleep.

Chronicles of toddler and his new big boy bed..

2012-01-24T17:25:00.000-08:00

Day 1: complete success. I was impressed that day 1 went off without a hitch. After much climbing out and small child smashing with incredibly ungraceful landings we decided to convert the crib to the toddler bed. We knew it was coming and wanted to hold off longer but with another baby coming in nearly 4.5 months and only having 1 crib we knew we would need to switch soon. So fearfully we did it. Day 1 he didn't notice the change. we set up a roll bar, and put a blanket over top so he still felt enclosed and safe, laid him down like we would in his crib and he was asleep as usual in minutes. THANK YOU JESUS.

Day 2: Not so smooth.... but eventually got there. The morning of day 2 he woke up at 7:15 as usual and was pleasantly suprised that he could get in and out on his own. Like it had been this way the whole time and only discovered it now. He happily jumped in and out of his bed until we left for work. Nighttime came round, Luke had class and so the routine is up to me. At 7:10 I put him in his jams, 7:18 I take him upstairs to our bed to read night night books, finish the rest of his milk, say bye bye to the milk and now we only get water until morning, and brush his teeth, read books abour brushing teeth but instead of being really focused he is a bit crazy and jumpy. The milk is done and starts to get cranky about it, I say no its all done we only get water now, it's time to brush your teeth. While he brushes, he doesn't listen to the books and brush his teeth with them as usual, though does stop to say "up and down, round and round" but then continue to barrel roll through the bed. "i jump I JUMP!" - " No jack its time to read books and go to bed" I say. He continues to bounce. I say " well i guess book time is over, time for night night night, lets go to bed' i pick him up and we go to bed, he climbs into the big boy bed but is fussy and won't lay down. "I get out!" - "no jack feet stay in bed, no getting out, it is bedtime" I say goodnight, put on his music and leave. He criieeeeesss and cries, but doesn't get out. I WAIT 15 MIN and then thump, bump bump bump, there he is at the door, crying, "BOOOOK BOOOK" I open the door to tell him, "back to bed", he cries and climbs back into bed. (by the way all of this is unlike him, he usually reads books and goes to sleep! he is the EASIEST KID TO PUT TO BED.) Anyway I tuck him back in he still cries and cries, i tell him again to stay in bed. I leave again, stand my the door waiting, then, bump bump bump, i put hims back in bed. 2 more times of this in a 60 second timespan we go through the same thing and i think, good lord if I'm going to drag a toddler back to bed 100x tonight I might as well take 5 more min to read a freak'n book if it works. so I say "1 more book". We lay down in my bed as he catches his sobs and calms down. He tells me about the pictures and makes all the sound effects of the animals, after the book is done, i close it and HE says 'night night book".. UUUMMMM WHAT? "night night milk (he sees it on the bedside table) night night light, night night room, night night car" and continues to say night night to all around him. I pick him up and walk to his room, pray over Him like every night, worship music on, lay him down and put a blanket over the roll over bar again, a blanket over him, give him his 'dirty dog' and winnie the pooh and show him that his bed is just the same, no different, the same place he sleeps every night. I say 'night night Jack'. and he goes to sleep, only 20 min past his bedtime, it could have been way worse.. It has been 30 min. no crying, no fighting, no getting out, just a peaceful sleeping toddler....

Winter Onederland!

2012-01-22T11:33:00.000-08:00

It was a wonderful friends daughter, Little Miss Lorelei's first birthday in December and I was so lucky to be asked to capture it. Born to such amazingly creative parents, they didn't forget a detail. What a sweetie pie, the theme was Winter Onederland and it really was beautiful. From cupcakes to crafts and to what seemed like hundreds of hand cut snowflakes hanging throughout the house, they really made a special first birthday for their little princess. Happy Birthday Lorelei! What a beautiful Party!

cutest little birthday shoes and tutu!

beautifully decorated snowflake cookies, perfect for their theme!

little miss herself, dressed as the ONEderland Princess


little feet

a yummy hot chocolate station, complete with marsh mellows and hot apple cider

and cinnamon sticks...

I loved their home, many beautiful, unique and quirky things just like this..

lots of fun, balloons everywhere, snowflakes hanging everywhere, it was beautiful! this mommy doesn't miss a detail!

Happy Birthday to you!

and devoured!

looks yummy! i should have tried one!!

so many sweet little babies all dressed for the occasion

little crafter at work...


snuggles and tickles from mommy


enjoying her rocking horse...

Happy Birthday Lorelei!

falling in love.

2012-01-19T12:20:00.000-08:00

every few hours you wake up and 'bump bump bump' for about a 1/2 hour and then you go back to sleep. i stink'n love it.

First Publishing in 2012!

2012-01-19T06:03:00.000-08:00

I was so privileged to be asked to have my art used for this the new CD 'Under my Wings" By Jeremy and Connie Sinnott. I am looking forward to this new Year and many new projects that I am very excited about. Stay tuned for more to come!

little miss or mr?

2012-01-17T06:09:00.000-08:00

We are 19 weeks along now, I know i have been really bad and getting the blogs out this pregnancy, i have just been very tired, unorganized, grumpy, all of the above and blogging has gotten pushed to the bottom of the list. Its coming around the time, actually THIS FRIDAY to find out if this little one is a little miss or mr and we have taken a bit of an (what seems to be) unusual but totally traditional approach to it... WE AREN'T FINDING OUT. thats right I, 'the planner' am not finding out!!! Its funny I was soo unsure about this at first, my husband suggested it as what an amazing surprise it would be to push this little one out and learn who they are but the more I don't know, i can see the fun it is, a few friends have done it and said it was ah-mazing, just the best surprise ever. and now I think I have just settled with the idea of not knowing. I think' i am ok with not knowing. So it leads for a bit of fun for the next 20 weeks, boy or girl? This pregnancy is totally different than the first. So here is the list.

I started to gain in my hips and waist filled in first (I haven't gained much weight but what I have gained you can see! With Jack it was just in the front)
you have already see it in my face! JUST WRONG in my opinion.my face didn't start filling in till th end with jack
I feel like I look like death (lol) but seriously, I'm definatly not the graceful, gleaming preggo I was with Jack, my skin is different, I am getting zits, I have never had zits!! not even in highschool. I look bagged all the time, can't seem to erase those bags under my eyes, and blotchy discoloration and ugh. yuck.
Belly is wider and higher (does that make sense?) I was looooow and out with jack, this one I'm all thick, and now starting to go out.
no morning sickness with this baby. a couple gags but that's about it. I barfed A LOT with Jack.
Cravings: SWEET AND SALTY! chips and a chocolate bar, delish and tons of milk. With Jack it was all about Sour pickles.
Heart Rate: all over the place, 167, 150, 152, 137. Keeps me guessing.
i am GRUMPY!! crazy emotional this time bordering neurotic, irritable, psycho.

I'm trying to think of anything else, I am definitely making pregnancy sound grand! but it really is just the reality of this one, but I feel fine. I have very little discomfort minus the random muscle pull or back ache, and I am sleeping, I have a pretty normal appetite, I am able to run around and play with my little guy and that is what I love! I guess every pregnancy is different, can't help but notice how different and wonder... but pink or blue I will have fun playing the guessing game until the end :)

December deals

2011-11-30T17:56:00.001-08:00

Hey all! check it out, amongst other works, this entire 'August 11' series is on sale 20% off for the month of December.

busy busy, but full of love.

2011-11-30T17:22:00.001-08:00

finally, there are words.

It has been a busy season, life is busy, busy with work, busy at home, busy in my mind, busy school for me and school for Luke is busy, we are coming to the closing of his Masters, we are seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and we are excited for a new season. It has been a long trek for him, but he is almost done and finishing strong.

I have been taking a photography class that I ABSOLUTELY adore and after 12 weeks it is coming to a close next week. I have learned and and gained so much invaluable information. I am blown away with the fullness I feel creatively. a new way to express all that i have pent up. I have so many ideas and i am excited.

My little man is growing, i can't believe he is nearly 2 already. my little man is turning into a little boy. He is so sweet and caring, he loves to explore and share and he just blows my mind. And of course like any other almost 2 year old he is individuating, learning his own boundaries, and testing ours. I am learning. every day is new but in the end, i could just stare at him for hours. He just makes me melt.

And who knew you could melt so much with another one! yup! We are preggers again! Today I saw our little one in an ultrasound. I don't know if I didn't realize it was real or what but I just saw him/her, their sweet little lips and swoopy nose, round little head and round cheeks and I just melted. Hello little one. Oh my. I am in love. all over again. They are mine. Its almost different this time b/c I know and understand the intense beautiful love for a child, my child. its amazing. I am full of love right now. i am smiling. Its been months of feeling anxious, stressed, emotional, grumpy. and right now, i am just full of love.

2011-11-23T05:35:00.001-08:00

i haven't written in some time, i just don't have anything to write!

Art with Heart: A Night on the Town

2011-10-15T05:15:00.000-07:00

Art with Heart is an incredible organization run by friend and fellow artist Sheri Gundry. They have great events to help raise money through auctioning art to support many different charities. Their 2nd Annual 'A night on the Town' gala is coming up on October 28th and this year I have been asked to be apart of it. It is an event to raise money to support the arts programs in Durham. I think this is so important, so of course I wanted to be involved! The gala event for 2011 will include dinner & drinks, live jazz and blues with the Heather Luckhart Collective, M/C Celebrity Chef Christian Pritchard, Comedy Improv Show with Secondy City Veterans Neil Crone & Kevin Franks, Art Show & Auction by talented local artists. Table sponsorship $500 for table of 8 with full tax receipt. Individual tickets available through sponsorship or by request at $65 each. Contact Jacquie 905-666-0158 or Sheri 905-430-7339. So if you love art and want to have a great night while supporting a great cause, come on out!

When: Friday, October 28 · 6:30pm - 11:30pm

Event dress: semi formal, 20's - 30's period ware appropriate

Where: Quality Hotel and Conference Centre

1011 Bloor Street East

Oshawa, ON

I'm published!!!!

2011-10-02T10:38:00.000-07:00

This was a personal goal for me this year, i had no idea how it would happen but I wanted to be published. It was to my great excitement when my dad asked me to illustrate a book I have been urging him to write for years. I was honoured to paint the cover and draw,along with another artist, Nancy Young, the illustrations, bringing the Secret place to Life. He has the most unique relationship with God, and this book is an account of a series of visions, the place that the father takes him to The Secret Place. Years ago the shack was published and really got people excited about the possiblilty that relationship with God could be like this. Well... it is. It can be. He wants to spend time with us just like that. My dad has been taken to the secret place for years, afraid to talk about it. He has never read the Shack b/c he never wanted to influence the place that God takes him to. This book isn't a fiction, it is an account of real life events that have happened to my father. He wrote this book with Jesus, it shows how incredible relationship with God is, and a workbook to teach others to hear Gods voice and learn to see your Secret place that God wants to meet you in, as well as sharing the incredible experiences he has had. It is really impactful, special and life changing.

If you would like to read the intro, forward and first chapter for free to see what its all about or for your own copy, email me subject: the secret place to sinnott07@gmail.com they are $15 CAD + shipping.

' the secret place' - prints available

beautiful increase

2011-09-29T11:20:00.000-07:00


"day 47" the beautiful increase 72 x 48 I have been working on this painting for a few weeks now and it is finally finished. funny enough I knew it would be completed on this day. day 47. Devin came home this day. we have a new addition to our family on this day, my heart is alive. i am taking flight. I learned to trust this day.

Catch the Fire

2011-09-29T10:04:00.000-07:00

I looove conference time, watchinglives be changed forever, being filled, growing, God doing some really amazingthings, and it just lights a fire under you all over again. It also gives me sometime away from little man and life and just rest in quietness with God. Paintingdoesn't have time restrictions or interruptions I can just get lost in it withJesus, completely clear minded and think about nothing else. Which is so greatb/c we have so much to talk about right now.

Along with A LOT more one ofour topics of our conversations: giving. Specifically on both Luke and mine’shearts, bless us, so we can bless others….We have been going through a tough time lately, this month taken a real hit, andat the same time, being challenged by God to really follow our hearts to giveand trust His provision. How on earth do you make that work? At the same timewe have been feeling like it has to be a real significant amount to give or maybeit just doesn’t matter…but not having that big amount to give.. and funnyenough having a stronger desire to help others than even myself, b/c asdesperate as situations can be, there is always someone that has an evengreater need. (it’s pretty complicated in this brain right now..)

Something happened that broke methis weekend. On Saturday a woman that had been sharing her heart with meearlier in the day, a woman that obviously lived in amazing obedience and trustthat God would take care of her (I always really admire people like this), thatcame to this conference on very little money just trusting in His amazingprovision b/c she felt He told her to come, handed me a note while I wassetting up to paint for the next session. I opened it up and a few coins fellout into my hand. My heart just broke, I knew she had so little. I was quickly reminded of the woman that gaveonly a few pennies into the offering bucket b/c that‘s all she had to give, butshe gave out of a giving heart. God pressed into my heart, no matter how little, it is all significant. Don’t be concernedwith how it is possible, I am your provider. Here this woman gave me thelittle she had. $1.11, in trust, b/c God told her to give it to me.… I wantfaith like that.

Since we have beenmarried, we have amazingly survived, off very little, and we never had a doubtthat God wouldn’t provide. Why is it so easy now to fall into fear? On Saturday we had LOOOOOOONG talks and i am working though it. I painted 4 pieceson Saturday. I really just felt to stay and paint the whole time. So I sat at the front and painting nearly all day. Just pouring out my heart to him of everything that has been on my mind. With a wave of emotions from heartbreak to Joy, with worship and in intercession i painted and painted and painted and painted. It was a good day. I woke up on Monday with a whole new mind set, feeling good, secure, trusting, loved and just happy.

Here they are,

‘Bless us’

24 x 36. Gallerycanvas,

Newsprint (scripture), acrylicand oil pastel

SOLD

‘So we can blessothers” (not sure of the official title on this one yet.)

36 x 40. Gallery canvas

Newsprint (scripture), acrylicand oil pastel

‘DAY 44, Blessings’

20 x 40. Acrylic onCanvas

A woman came to mesaying , this painting, its blessings!! Multiplying, coming down, they all lookdifferent in many ways, shapes and forms, they never look the same! I liked it, so it stuck.

‘Holy, Holy, Holy’ –WorshippingHands

18x36 Canvas

Newsprint (scripture), acrylicand oil pastel

I’m pretty sure thisone will get the paint over, it didn’t turn out like I hoped so If you want itlet me know. I will give you a great deal… Like 50$ (so I can buy a new canvasinstead)

newest member of our clan

2011-09-28T05:37:00.000-07:00

Since Etnie passed there seems to be a real gap in our hearts. Missing her, wanting Jack to grow up with a dog and continue and encourage his love for animals. I came across this little on yesterday on Kijiji and it was only hours later we were driving to Oshawa to meet her. I heard really clearly meeka in my head and in my heart, i looked it up and it is Japanese, it means 'Lord, Beautiful aroma, beautiful increase" Beautiful increase.... that just felt right. Meet Meeka, she is 8 weeks old, our new little baby.

inspiration

2011-09-26T13:01:00.000-07:00

isn't this fabulous? It isn't mine, I wish I could say it was and I also wish I could remember the artists name. dang. credit where credit is due, when I find it I will post it. I just love the combination of visual texture, vibrancy yet still soft and peaceful. Ah! Just stunning. bravo.

Circles and Squares...

2011-09-20T18:08:00.000-07:00

for kate, 20 x 40

I got the opportunity to paint with a friend this past week, Trayc Dudgeon, something we have only done a few times before but is always interesting to see what comes about. Circles and Squares... 2 completely different styles forced to come together to create one piece. I originally came across the Concept a few years with a friend and fellow artist Elisabeth Heidinga during a conference - live painting. We challenged ourselves and felt really strongly that we were suppose to work together on the same painting. Some amazing things happened that day and we kinda shocked the church, 2 artist - known as such an individual craft, sharing a canvas, working together. It was a huge message about unity in the church and how God designed us to work as a body and not individuals. Since then I have a great time doing collaborations with other artists. It is such a unique experience. And really amazing freedom to paint and not feel threatened or competition but only as success if you surrender and work together in Unity. On Thursday,Tray and I paintied into the night, had a great time talking, catching up, drinking wine and painting and created these 2 pieces for 2 special friends and their 30th Birthdays! Girls I hope it was incredibly special, you both are very wonderful.

For Lindsay, 20 x 40

and by accident they fit together.... now if that doesn't say a whooole lot about using our creativity and how God wants to use us together... I don't know what does.. that is kinda rad. "Day 36" 20 x 80

jack is helping me paint the really big one I am working on now.

His creativity has no limits.

2011-09-20T16:46:00.000-07:00

So... here is it 41 days later, i am still painting.. i had a slight pause there but it's back. My colour pallat has changed again but it is vibrant. Something about this all coming out. it amazing to me the pallat changes over the years. Oranges with the jazz series in to blues and moody beiges and browns, but now reds and yellows and purple and green! I am excited for the vibrancy coming out of me. new life, new beginnings, new something, over flowing, exploding out of me. my work is so much about the process of my heart, my mind, my spiritual journey i'm excited to see what this is all maturing into. I still feel to paint, paint paint paint, paint vomit... let it all out and then look at it and see what you ate for breakfast. (lol grosse) but my point its fast, its flows, it comes out violently, and i just need to get it all out to feel better. My studio is quickly filling and it is wonderful to see life overflowing out of me again..

“well you pick me up and you spun me around and you set myfeet on solid ground - Hallelujah! – B/c you’re so good, your soo sooo good” I have had this stuck in my head for about 3days. And along with it has come painting! Ahhhh. i really do love painting. I finished up the last (fornow) red painting, 'day 23', and continued in the same style and ventured into anew pallat. i get glimpses of what this is all about but i have yet to have the revelation of what it all means. I believe every stroke, every colour, the placement, the movement, he can speak to you about. And there millions in every painting so how exciting is that, that's a whooole lot of talking and learning and growing. I am stopping myself from evaluating. from thinking if it is good or not. I have been learning (and it has been an ongoing battle) that my value is not determined by my work, or # of sales i have. It is my heart. and really that's all that matters.Though I'm still waiting on the big revelation but i get bits and pieces. Alittle bit about babies, the womb, intercession, getting down to the beginning,the cellular structure, the basis, trust, rapid multiplication of cells in new life, umm awhole lot of stuff that is connected but not connected, but I assume will come together,but it has led me to a place of hope. Where things are taking off, in flight,there is some kind of release, a new season.

You know as artist we easily get caught up in the "is it good enough?" the thing is, It is not about being good - it is about self. it's about your heart. It is about growth. It is about being true to your heart and letting every part of you flow out in whatever medium it wants to. so it doesn't matter if its good. Just let it go and be secure in you as an artist and let go. Create without judging your self,without fear. Create for healing, for spending time with God, for just expressing the beautiful person that YOU ARE! I am inspired, I am motivated. I want to create. The past couple years I have been collecting. Books, materials, canvases, different mediums, papers, scratch boards, and printmaking, encaustics, a potters-wheel, clay, photography equipment. It has all been stirring in me to create, but just brewing without action. His creativity is limitless and I think that He wants us to create limitlessly (is that a word? ) so ours should be too! This has been a pretty big internal battle for some time for me.. I have been holding myself back for wayyy to long from doing some things that I absolutely love.

Again there is so much happening, our situation hasn’t changed but mymindset has this week. We will live. Life will move on and I just have toremember that God is in control.

"DAY 23"24 X 48

In this piece I noticed the changing of shapes, less round and becoming more oval, like wings, fluttering, and the next picture I saw thatcaused me to pull out a canvas I have been sitting on for a while. A 72” x 48”gallery canvas. I love it. (I would paint this big every time if I had the spaceto store them.) I began to paint washes and washes and washed, over and overcolours layered, I am still going, and I am loving it. I miss painting thisbig!!! It is about freedom. In that trust, taking flight. I will post it when it’s done but it is still in progress in painting and in my heart.

replace fear with curiosity

2011-09-20T13:48:00.000-07:00

I found this picture and i absolutely love it. it kind of enbodies all of me right now.. You may or may not have known that I am a complete fanatic about photography. viewing GREAT photography feeds me, it somehow just pours into my spirit in a way that somehow not even painting does. I would fill my walls with stunning photos that take your breath away. I have already started my collection with a stunning photo by Samantha McAndrews a great Barrie photographer, and a few beautiful orchid pieces i have loved for many years by Trayc Dudgeon, a brampton based Photographer. I cannot wait to continue piecing works together to hang. I envision a wall in my house combined with art and photography and special pieces all over the house. You know I have been selling for a while but I just love art and photography so much I really want to start collecting more of others work. There is something so unique about original art, special, something that you can never replicated and the combination of great photography with original paintings, ahh it just makes my heart sing!

So how does this all to in to replacing fear with curiosity...? Well i finally decided to put away my fear and explore with curiosity and let my heart FREAK'N SING! Since High school I have been incredibly drawn to photography and a strong desire to make photos! Something has been holding me back. Afraid to step on feet, offend people, fear of the equipment, not enough knowledge, etc etc. its been about 15 years.. and a million reason that I have told myself why I can't. Cautiously I dawdled in helping in some weddings, and did some fun shoots of my own but really didn't get in there. But as a creative person ad locking down even one part of your heart that wants to express itself is self destructive!! and wanting to explore ALL of my creativity, it is killing me that I have been holding back for so long. So with the encouragement of many wonderful friends and family I picked up my SLR I bought 2.5 years ago ~~and have never learned to completely use properly~~, and enrolled in a photography class at Sheridan College, part of the photography program there. 2 classes in and I am so excited!!! I have learned SO much already and actually challenging myself to explore and be curious!!

So i guess this is to all of you that just are making up SO many excuses as to why you aren't trying something you love. Just pick it up and try! what have you got to loose? You are only stopping yourself from growing and learning and expressing your heart and having some great conversations with God! He has SOOO much that He wants to show you and create with you. So Replace your fear of the Unknown with Curiosity and Take off in Flight!

Art in the Junction

2011-09-20T11:37:00.001-07:00

Well it is that time of the year again. The Junction. A GREAT little creative community in Toronto that i love to be apart of and show in each year. Unfortunately this year Junction Arts Festival was canceled, but a local shop owner that I have come to know over the years allowed me to come put up the new series anyways. Last weekend I headed out and brought over my work to hang in this funky little space. If you are in the area, go for a walk have a latte and crema coffee and stop by! The Hair Lounge, The Junction, Toronto.

back to painting.

2011-09-16T11:14:00.000-07:00

so after some real crap lately, i decided to pick myself back up and dust off and continue on. Painting.. Man there really is something about this that is really healing for me. Last night a friend of mine came over and we just chilled out with some wine and paint and painted and painted and painted. Pics to post soon. Funny that just putting some paint on a canvas can just make all the difference in the world. Some kind of release that just sets me free. so there is much more to post, 3 new pieces and 1 more almost completed, i am excited to see it's progress coming along and can't wait to see it upon completion! So here i continue on my little journey. life, spirituality, wholeness, growth. and entering a new season of freedom and learning to fly.

2011-09-13T14:18:00.000-07:00

ok so my last post wasn't very uplifting.. I think I am just going through a time of being... pooped' on. Life is kind of upside down. I will choose to see the silver lining. but just needing some life to come forward and burst out of these situations so that i know it's not going to continue raining.

2011-09-12T13:44:00.001-07:00

my dog died and my painting came to a hault...

2011-09-11T19:12:00.000-07:00

have you ever had a week or month, or season you wish would just Stop? ... you know the kind that are upside down that when you have been kicked to the ground and then get trampled by the stampede of elephants?... the kind that starts with a sick child, sick husband, broken camera, followed by poo and barf all over the house, being ripped off, hurt yourself every chance you can, v8 on the floor by a swatting toddler, spaghetti sauce on the walls, 2 dead pets, a hit and run, financially drowning, busy, exhausting, deflating, defeated, filled with disappointments, GOD WHERE ARE YOU week?

i'm having one of those....

more paintings... keep spilling out

2011-08-31T11:08:00.000-07:00

new works from the new series keep on coming.. I find the transformation of shapes interesting. I am fascinated by the cellular like structure of them. I felt to name them the each they day how old Devin is the day i painted it. Works will be showing soon in the Junction at a little hair salon I have shown at the past few years called 'the hair lounge', Toronto check it out if you like. I am happy to hear feedback, as I still am unsure what they are all about, and love that one has sold already!

day 13
30 x 30 acrylic

day 14
24 x 48 acrylic

day 15.. am
16 x 20 acrylic


day 15 pm 16 x 20 acrylic


in progress 10 x 30 acrylic

and now the big one!!!! 48 x 72

my heart is shaken and my hands can't stop paintin'

2011-08-23T05:29:00.000-07:00

i have written so many posts these pasts few weeks, but unable to continue a full thought or maybe too personal to post. My heart aching, from a prayer I prayed 'show me your heart' but then flooded with an intense amount of emotion for almost every situation I encountered. Up for entire nights, crying and praying for families or situations and eventually being unable to deal and trying to express, and being overwhelmed that I became emotionally constipated, all just stuck inside of me brewing.. Trying to talk to God, paint, do anything to talk, but i just continued to be more and more bunged' up..

Craziness filled my lives with STUFF. family stuff, friends stuff, work stuff, health issues and scary situations swarming in my brain and in my heart and then one day without expectation, it came to sudden hault. On Aug 11, 8:30 am a call that changed our lives. he was here.. the tiniest more perfect little guy. My nephew Devin Joshua was born at 29.5 weeks gestation in the NICU, just 3lbs 4oz. I won't share all of the scary heart-wrenching details that changed me. but here I stood broken. afraid. desperate. nothing else mattered other that asking Jesus to to intervene. to save the life of this little one.

So bottled up, alone and Jack sleeping I began to paint. Paint from my heart paint in worship. paint in prayer, in intercession. Broken, I just began to baul my eyes out and just pour out everything onto this canvas. . All that stirring came started to finally spill over. as the tears poured so did heart and my brush didn't stop moving. my entire being became a dance of an interceding warrior, dancing with angels, to fight for this little guys life. Strange shapes emerging, a new colour pallet, still insure what any of it meant i didn't care I kept painting. my brain began to sort thoughts, make sense of things, i continued to paint, canvases are filling my studio and here I am 11 days later, and I am still painting. my heart is shaken, my hands can't stop painting. little Devin is getting bigger, growing stronger, he is such a miracle, he is breathing on his own, off the iv, nearly back to his birthweight, blowing everyone away with his progress. He has such divine purpose and calling on his life. Ah. what amazing words have been spoken over him. God is showing me incredible pictures of the 2 of them, that I can't wait to paint. I thank God he is alive and grateful for everything.

So here we start a new unexpected series... August 11


"Day 1" 48 x 48, acrylic on canvas

"Day 3" 12 x 48, acrylic on canvas - SOLD

"Day 4" 24 x 48, acrylic on canvas

"Day 8" 20 x 20, acrylic on canvas

"Day 11" 30 x 40, acrylic on canvas

teaching time!!

2011-08-22T09:23:00.000-07:00

I had an awesome opportunity to teach this week. I had 2 days with 15 awesome students at a bible college in Toronto the School of Worship at Catch the Fire. It sparked in me knowing, really knowing that this is what i want.And I am excited to teach again and hope to get asked back soon!.

the ongoing quest to conquer clutter #2

2011-06-29T07:44:00.000-07:00

so i have started to feel overwhelmed by 'stuff'.
my room, my studio, my storage, my closets, bathrooms, garage.. ugggghhh STUFF!! Its everywhere!!! I clean, i tidy, i organize but cannot get a handle on all this stuff. the thought of this house is too small, often runs through my house, but really its this ongoing clutter problem!! my husband thinks there is a little bit of 'hoarder in me. Though I disagree entirely, i must admit i do have a problem with throwing things away. for instance the 8 million back issues of design, art and parenting magazines. And the problem isn't that there is one that collect, its all of them!! they seem to be hiding in every area you can find.. the studio, the office, bookshelves, my bed, bedside table, under the bed, in the closet in the living room. I am obsessed with design magazines. interior design, DIY, Graphic design, interactive design, photography, fine art magazines (and my new collection, today's parent). Uggghhh!! As much as I love them all and picture my office with tall gorgeous white bookshelves neatly arranged in apple green matching magazine sleeves, lining my walls behind my L shaped desk, drafting center, neatly organized my month and year, cataloged by subject and style to draw upon inspiration at any point... it just doesn't seem realistic or feasible to keep them around the house until that fabulous studio comes. I don't want to become that woman that gets buried in her ever growing magazine collection that overtakes her entire home and swallows her up. but to part... ahhh it feels so final..

i have been feeling stressed lately. I have been working on a book project that is coming to the end and going to production soon. But it has been tough, not only the stress of deadlines againa nd working as fast as possible, but my house. living in my house is feelign stressful. I feel overrun by toys, and clothes and stuff! And i know how much freer and better I feel when all the extra stuff is gone. I was reading an article on organization a could of days ago and it was talking about conquering the area that has set you off into stressful crazy mode to begin with. For me it is my bedroom. I just can't seem to keep that beast of a closet under controll. no matter how much I throw out, it just is alwas bursting from the seams.

.
The last time i did this, I think was when i was preggers with Jack. And God just had sooo much to talk to me about about me, not just clean up my house but clean up my heart. So maybe here we start again. on Sunday some things happened that started to stir my heart and something hasn't been sitting right with me since. Maybe it's time to get some clear answers, spend sometime with Abba. Luke is starting 2 course for his MBA this next course load. it is the first time he's done this. one class and working full time is insane enough i can't imageine what 2 will be like. Pretty much I am husband-less for the next 7 weels. I don't even know what i'm going to do without him. I found myself saying yesterday I need a new project. Well I think I just found one. Operation: Clutter..

The eye of the storm.

2011-06-28T14:03:00.000-07:00

I am sitting in my office today with what feels like the entire company whizzing around me. Month End.. it is one of the busiest weeks of the entire season. Everyone is going bananas, shit hitting the fan and splattering in every direction. Right now my office is one of the most stressful, tense environments you have ever felt. This summer is the first summer that I am not working full time as a coordinator. I guess I should add a little bit of background. Prior to our little man joining our life I worked for a Relocation firm handling the logistics for Corporate relocations around the Globe. We are the # 1 corporate mover in North America and pretty much the leaders in our field. We are all about perfection, details, expertise because frankly, they are the best and only believe in building a culture of excellence. So when it comes to the end of the month in each summer month – the busiest weekends for moving, all of these company values of excellence + all the stress from your clients (moving is one of the top 5 most stressful experiences in your entire life, I think close to divorce, and clients can be pretty high strung sometimes) anything going wrong is a great recipe for losing your mind. This year is the first, that I don’t have to handle it all!! Because since little man has been born they were so gracious to set me up at the front desk working part time handling admin work for the company and research for our fine arts department. Which is great! but It’s a strange feeling not being a part of the hussle and bussle of the insanity. I feel like I’m in a tornado as it swirls around me, but I am in the eye of the storm. Just working away in complete peace as chairs and desks and cars, screams, phones ringing, people running around up and down the stairs, in and out of meetings, scrambling around in the storm surrounding my desk.

I was talking to my mom about this, expressing how strange it felt, to not feel worried or stressed at all and she said you know it’s kind of amazing when you think of it, this is how life is when trusting God, being caught up with the life happening all around and just living in peace, not worried that he has taken care of it all.

So today I am grateful for the fact that I no longer have such a stressful job that it makes me cry, or in my case go into labour repetitively 3 months early, I’m grateful that I feel at peace that right now even in some uncertainty and what feels frustrating, I know that God is taking care of it all and I that I choose to live centered, trusting Him in the peace of any storm that may come my way.

kitchen progress 3

2011-06-23T17:19:00.000-07:00

well i will FINALLY have my completed beautific backplash by the end of the night (then grouting and sealing but at least it is up! I am a happy wife. no more tools in my kitchen.

17 MONTHS!!

2011-06-23T12:15:00.000-07:00

There aren't even enough words to describe how much joy you bring us. Happy 17 months little man!

The Book Project: The Secret Place

2011-06-16T17:14:00.000-07:00

I have been working and a little project that I have been loving and can't wait to share... I have been doing the illustrations for a book soon to be released called 'The Secret Place'. Alongside another artist we completed 19 graphite illustrations, some mine, some hers, some a collaboration of us both. But just this week I was asked my the publisher and author to paint the cover!! What was originally going to be photography, they felt that a colour drawn image would relate better to the overall feel and flow better with the illustrations. What an honour!!!! i quickly jumped and began to work. I prayed asked abba to show me and started painting.

kitchen progress 2

2011-06-11T16:44:00.001-07:00

after a long day of luke trying to sand these freak'n cupboards. i send him to benjamin moore, who's staining specialist tells us. umm if you've been sanding the crap out of these... their not wood.."

SHIT

So now we are figuring out what to do. we took back all our beautiful tile. b/c it doesn't work with our existing cupboards. that super sux. now off to rethink this whole thing...

kitchen progress..

2011-06-11T08:11:00.000-07:00

well, the floors are - bought, the backsplash - bought, the stain for the cupboards - bought, everything we need to do it - bought... so WHY is it taking so long!!!??? UGGGHH luke went to town smashing out walls a few weeks back where the backsplash was and in a week dry walled, mudded and tapes new walls all back up. Wonderful husband, next step is the cupboards which we are both going to work on, but right now he is super busy with school and... well busy me, with art and shows and teaching and illustrating a book, cleaning house, taking care of baby sanding all those cupboards is the last thing on my list to do. So while on a nap today Luke showed me how to use the hand sander. He is writing exams all day today so it was a good time or me to start the cupboards. Ugggggh!!! after 10 min, 1/2 of a test chair done - sloppy) , I hate it already. How on earth am I going to get through 21 cupboards sanded perfectly? This is hell. the stain is stubborn, and won't come off easily. i am dreading the next 21 cupboards. I just want this done. any advice is welcomed!!

babies babies babies

2011-06-06T14:16:00.000-07:00

everywhere I look I see those round bellies, or teeny tiny little ones. I am filled with giggles and smiles as that intoxicating "new baby" smell fills my nose and makes me gaga. i thought i had it before, a 'yah I could have another one of those' but now the though swarms my mind, taking over every other possible one. it is official,

i've got the itch.

the image interview

2011-05-23T18:28:00.000-07:00

Well it is finally out! This was a ton of fun, and I like how it turned out.

The Image Interview: Featuring Heather Sinnott

16 months!!!

2011-05-21T20:15:00.000-07:00

My little boy is 16 months old!!!! Jack, you are amazing!!!! you say 30, count em' 30 WORDS!! (my favourites are when you name the animals in your books and the noise they make! like "duck! kak kak", or "lion, roooaaaar" dang. you are a smartie pants, you climb, you paint, you sing, you jump and balance on one foot, you explore, your dancing is the cutest thing I have ever seen. you amaze me with how fast you learn things and how you aren't afraid to just try. Its like we can watch you calculate in your brain how to do something and then conquer it. You bring so much joy to me and your daddy's life. We love all your games and sillyness, being chased and laughing and jumping and hiding or running around with a towel on your head while you say "peek-boo!" you think everything is hilarious! you love the park, the slide, the swings, the sand and run there as fast as you can as soon as you head out of the front door. and when we leave, you run back! You love to show people your toys, and (so cute) you showing visitors your backyard taking them to all the areas, pointing at the flowers, the grass, your toys. You are the best. I really can't wait to spend every moment with you. I love you Jack! happy 16 months!

2 long years

2011-05-21T19:52:00.000-07:00

it has been 2 long years and while with my aunt for a walk through the art store something caught my eye... and finally the wheels started turning. it has finally arrived... the inspiration I have been waiting for... keep watch, i'm excited, its gonna be fun.

The Kitchen Project

2011-05-10T14:10:00.000-07:00

ohh my oh my, what excitement for me!! we are starting the kitchen project! Which we think will actually be the first of a few projects around the house. Just to get this place exactly how we want it. I think we have been putting this off for a while b/c we just figured we wouldn't be in this house very long, but the longer we are here, the more we are wanting to enjoy every inch of this place as much as we do our newly renovated backyard.

the kitchen project... Its not that our kitchen is totally offensive or anything, in fact, i really like our cupboards, but we need a new floor, and I have hated the backslash and counter tops since we bought the place. So yesterday on mothers day after receiving some gorgeous flowers, handmade cards from my little guy (those are truly the best) amazing waffles, with fruit and yumminess! I received the gift of 'mary' ohhh thank you luke!! for anyone that doesn't understand what this means, it means the gift of an actual lady named mary. She is a cleaning lady that will come to my house and give it a biiig much needed scrub, from top to bottom for spring cleaning!!! ohhhhhh HAAAAALELUIAH!!!! I need the help so much, it was the best gift i could have ever been given. So I am compiling my list of what needs to be done. Mary I can't wait for you to come...

Anyway back to my kitchen! after all of this wonderfulness, we decided that home depot would be a great place to go just b/c we love home depot, and lowes and rona and great building and decorating projects and the ideas have been flowing for a while... We are going to do a bit of an overhaul. Not crazy like blowing 30,000$ but just changing, tweaking, and alot of DIY!! Writing this I think I will document it, how fun is that! First we found our floors, easy to install and were on sale! so we bought them. Also after ogling over many backsplashes. we just decided to spoil ourselves and we went for it. ohh the glass mosaic blended with slate, we just love it and decided it was worth the cost for our own wow factor to fall inlove with suuuch a gorgeous kitchen over and over and over again. So we bought a few square feet to look at them in the space and of we LOVE IT!! we are going back today to buy the rest. I cannot wait to tear out the existing backsplash that I LOATHE!!! this horrible pink ceramic tile with baskets of fruit Carved into every few. BARF.

Next we priced out a new counter, the existing counter is kinda a weird grey, light purple and pink mix, which matches the amazing tile work! (oh joy!) which is almost neutral from a distance.. but why anyone would choose this colour is beyond me, but it's there. it in perfect condition, and Its not terrible unless you look at it and realize what it actually is and I hate it... so we went to go look at new ones.. but YIKES! I had no idea it would be so costly to replace your counter, we are looking at alternative options perhaps more cost effective but not quite sure what yet.

Lastly the cupboards. Though I do love my cheery bright kitchen with pale pine cupboards, there is something soo classy and grown up about expresso cupboards, rich but warm colour palate. We have been appreciating this kind of kitchen for years, and though we have been just satisfied with having a kitchen that doesn't look like it's from 1970, we are ready for a change. we are wanting to perk these cupboards up! They are looking a bit worn and need a reviving anyway!!

This whole project was inspired by Luke's Aunt, who took a nice' house and made it STUNNING just by refinishing all of the wood in her new house. She bought this product by 'sue kay' makes a type of Gel stain that is the easiest thing I have ever seen and looks amazing!

So here we start our new little project... I needed a project to take my mind of art, not that I am not loving it i just need a bit of a break. Its a new season. I feel like for the past bit we have been in the winter, in hibernation. Yesterday when I was in the garden I found 27 new lily of the valley spikes, breaking through the ground. The way Lily of the valley grows is you can plant a few pips' (or even one) in the ground and over the winter, it's roots run wild under the ground, and then in the spring start to spring up all over the place, they multiply like crazy!! . Surprising you, breaking through the earth. Their flowers, though tiny, spread at an alarming rate and have the sweetest most incredible and strong fragrance. A few weeks ago I got a picture for a friend of the roots running, moving so quickly through this dry earth, they were growing so fast and large that they were breaking through the dry ground b/c of the speed at which they traveled. Yesterday when looking in my garden, seeing all my little sproutlings, I felt this was for me too but God spoke to me differently about it. it's been a season of hibernating, and through the winter my roots have been rapidly increasing, growing, running wild under the earth, they are starting to sprout up, breaking ground and will grow and blossom in multitudes popping up when i least expected. And though they may be small they are the most beautiful fragrant flowers their fragrance will blow in the wind and you can smell it from far away. That they will continue to multiply and bless more and more people. Of all of this, I don't know where my new kitchen comes in or the house update but maybe it's just a new start, freshness and place to enjoy, a new season. I cannot wait to get going on it!!

World Aids Day

2011-04-29T13:08:00.000-07:00

Buy art and donate to an excellent cause! 2 of my pieces will be up for auction, check it out!

The University of Western is having a World Aids Day Benefit Concert and Silent Auction on May 4 & 5, 2011 at the Metropolitan United Church, London ON Proceeds to be split between The Escolinha 17 de Setembro, a preschool for AIDS Orphans in Mozambique and University Lab School at the University of Western Ontario. Call 519-661-3699 for ticket information. 2 works will be there available for bidding!
Come support a great cause!

Post Nurtured Baby Show!!

2011-04-17T17:34:00.000-07:00

Well the show was good, I was pleasantly surprised that by the end of the afternoon I was approached by a store, telling me they were very interested in my work, loving it and asking me to supply kids art for their Shop! I am really excited to sell my little illustrations there! this will be great! So if you are ever in Orangeville, check out 'Wee needs' and 'Nurtured' to find my work!Prints and originals available.

Also I just loved connecting with people, and a great new opportunity and was invited to teach classes at a new arts center opening up there in September, details to be released soon!

Yaaah what a great day!

Nurtured Baby Expo!

2011-04-15T12:28:00.000-07:00

Nurtured Baby Expo TOMORROW!!

Saturday, April 16 · 10:00am - 4:00pm

Monora Park Pavilion

633220 Hwy 10

Orangeville ON

The first annual show spectacular for expectant and new parents!
Local vendors, products and services geared towards expanding families!!

I will be there! Check it out!

~Small entry fee of $2 per adult, half of which will go to charity!

...~ Fashion Show~

~ Demos and workshops!!

~ Fabulous Swag Bags for the first 100 people!!

UPDATES!!

2011-04-15T07:11:00.000-07:00

I have been a busy bee.

check what's new!

1. PROJECTS IN PROCESS

The Hope Project: The Hope Project is something that has been stirring in my heart for about 1.5 years now. As it develops I just get more excited. I hope for it to become a yearly or biyearly event. The Hope Project is a big art show for all artists to donate 1-3 pieces to sell and to raise money for different charities.

Love for Japan: Is another project that is in my heart, raising money for the recent tragedies in Japan. Works of art will be sold with 1/2 of the proceeds to be donated to Japan.

The Book Project: This project is out of personal interest. I am currently working on illustrating a series of Baby/Toddler Books, will include, counting, ABC, Nursery Rhymes and more as ideas develop. I will be blogging about its progress so follow along!

The Mural Project: This project is still in the works but I am hoping the details will be worked out soon. Along with photographer and artist Trayc Dudgeon we will be redesigning and painting the mural the Playroom for Sick Kids Hospitals’ Ronald McDonald House. I am really excited about it and can’t wait to get to work!

2. UPCOMING SHOWS

Fundraiser/Auction for World Aids Orphans Day, May 7th, 2011 at University of Wester Ontario. 2 pieces showing and up for auctioned.

Artist of the month: Credit Valley Hospital
Maternity/Obstetrics Wing, July 1-31, 2011

Brampton Arts Festival: Artist Vendor, original sales, minis, prints and cards to be sold, live painting in Booth in Downtown Brampton. Come Check it out! July 16th, 2011

Junction Arts Festival: September 2011 More
information to come

Live Painting at Catch the Fire in Toronto, various event and dates.

3. RELEASING NEW NURSERY COLLECTION! to be on the website soon!

4. RELEASING NEW CARDS AND PRINTS FROM ALL COLLECTIONS

5. FINE ART SERVICES AVAILABLE:

• Fine art original sales (available in different styles from Representational to abstract please see my website for examples www.heathersinnott.com)

• Commissions: looking for something specific?
Or see something you love, but it is already sold or not in the colour you want? I will paint for you a customized piece to suit your wants and needs.

• Expressively Yours: Personalized original art works: send me a photo you love and I will create an original, unique expressive painting of your little one! Different sizes available.

• Letters to little ones: write a letter to your little one, I will create an original piece with your little one’s name and written letter to them, incorporating the words you have written. An incredible cherished gift to them for years to come.

• Art Prints: in a variety of different sizes

• Art Greeting Cards: art cards from original pieces blank inside, glossy finish, can be customized for you!

• Personalized Baby name plates (cost per letter)
Individual 5 x 7 letters, designed to your colours and style, tied with satin ribbon for hanging

• Murals: nurseries, kids rooms, playrooms, adult Living spaces.

• Design Services: Birth Announcements, thank you cards, birthday & shower invitations. (Professional services available such as poster design, ads, logo design, portfolio design, brochures etc.)

• Birthday Parties: arts and crafts with your kids!

• Kids - Adult Art Workshops

BLOGGIN ON PAUSE

2011-04-10T07:32:00.000-07:00

just WAAAY to busy right now, seems that life has picked up with many awesome art oppertunities, every minute is utilized with painting, designing, planning projects. It is craziness and i AM LOVING IT!!! except that I have been missing a skype friend I talk to often and blogging which are 2 of my favourie things to do.

i think to blog but i don't have a ton to say b/c i have no time to think let alone write!
but I did get to sit down and get to relax in my amazing backyard yesterday with my honey and enjoy the warmth of the sun.. Decked out just premiered this past Thursday and is a Hit! Advertising everywhere!!! Great Reviews and looks like people are really happy with it. which i am really happy about, not only excited about our episode, but more importantly, God just blessing the socks off friends of ours! I mean, this kinda thing is just so rare. not only such awesome talent but God is just doing so much on each job site. I think those decks just carry His awesome presence and these amazing spaces they build are full of His awesomeness and Grace. Lives WILL BE transformed. Tune in on Thursdays 10 - 11pm Eastern Time on HGTV. or check out them out here.

i have been attending Hot Yoga classes, they blow my mind and body. I have gone down 2 pant sizes. it is rediculous. the best workout ever. and it is peaceful. i think it has been keepingme more balanced, b/c it is time for me to clear my mind and just be alone.

Yesterday I had a documentary style photo shoot with an art publication in Toronto, The Image Interview. It was this photographers personal project, his baby.. to see into the life and beauty of hard working artists, with great character and promote them, what they do and celebrate and appreciate who they are and what they do. It was fun, i love his style, so I can't wait to see the final product. And of course I will post when its up :)

I am still working on finishing up a few commissions, the Hope project, and have a few others under way. Orphans with Aids in Africa (fundraiser and auction in may 4th & 5th at University of Western) and Love for Japan, the mural project (excited about this!!! for sick kids hospital) and the book project (personal project.. we'll see where it goes..). About a month ago and man prayed for me at church, he simply said, "more dreams, more revelations" since then, it has been exploding. I love it, my mind if overflowing with ideas, and things I can do for others.. pictures, paintings, my brain, my heart is in overdrive and it is flowing and flowing. i am excited to create.

also Nutured Baby show is next weekend in Orangeville. I will have a booth there, check it out if you can, it should be great :) i have been busy designing promos and give aways, painting, printing, stuffing artists packages, i am a busy girl.

anyway that is the update on me.

BYE!

my space

2011-04-09T19:58:00.000-07:00

its not much, but its mine.. its where i create, where i worship, dream, explore my thoughts, my heart. Have many conversations with papa and well.. work!
I don't think i have EVER seen it this clean. kind a nice organized chaos.

moment to myself

2011-03-24T09:12:00.000-07:00

I took advantage of the baby's nap today and amidst all of the craziness of the upcoming nurtured show and a few commissions I have underway, I took a moment for me. I'm not sure what is stirring in my heart at the moment but there is something.. life is so busy. and i think it's easy to feel 2nd at times. balancing life, can often feel overwhelming, a young baby, a new family, a busy job, a new business, school, the future.. what's to come. This piece I painted, just for me. i don't know if it's done, it was a moment, it was a thought, it was apart of my heart that needed to be expressed. Its the first time in a while that i painted without putting expectation on myself... and. it felt free.

its called forget-me-not.

moment to myself

2011-03-24T09:10:00.000-07:00

its called forget-me-not.

forget-me-not

Triptych 8 x 8

acrylic on gallery canvas

All things Baby: Nutured

2011-03-23T06:31:00.000-07:00

I have been a very busy bee working away on an upcoming trade show “Nutured” baby show. It is an event put on by some wondering fun WAHM’s (work at home mom’s) and have inspired me to create some really fun things for my booth. Lots of great little baby mini’s and cute illustrations and lots of great things. Now here’s the thing… I am suddenly really inspired by this site a great friend sent me www.ohdeedo.com It has all these really cute nurseries and rooms. Of my goodness I am OBSESSED!! Ohhhh I want beautiful rooms!!!! Not that mine are crap I think I’ve done a good job but these.. this is a whole new world of really awesome, unique, creative interior design!!! On top of this, I want to make all these cute SUPER cute baby things, the nurseries are just gorgeous and they have suuuch cute things!!!! (and so easy for me to make, or make even cuter) So perhaps there is a new business venture of some sort, making cute baby things. Hmm. I’ll sit on it. Seems it might be a tiny market but maybe it could work. It’s just that not everyone can afford original art. Sales are fine but it would be nice to have something just fun and cute and not so serious that I can make money off of too. So maybe I’ll make up a great etsy shop and sell them.. I have one for my art, I never really got around to knowing how to use it. Perhaps now is the time.

Etsy shop up!

2011-03-23T06:29:00.000-07:00

I finally got my etsy shop up and working! will be updating often, check it out! cards, prints, paintings large and small, or just silly things i love to make.

http://www.etsy.com/shop/heathersinnott?ref=top_trail

all things baby...

2011-03-22T12:48:00.000-07:00

NEW JOB!! WAAHOOO

2011-03-14T18:39:00.000-07:00

my company has a fine arts dept and I just got taken on! i have been wanting to work in it since the dept opened and on Friday I was offered, and now I have a new job, still p/t, and offered full time when i am ready. i am working building the database. not overly exciting but i just get to research galleries and curators all day and make connections. NICE! I love how the little things just work sometimes.

DAY ONE...

2011-03-09T16:57:00.001-08:00

i already want to eat mini eggs. how am I going to last a month?

ok just b/c... LOOK AT THAT FACE!!!!

2011-03-08T13:47:00.000-08:00

CUUUUUUTEST!!!!! Bath time fun. Best time ever.

(photosbytrayc.... who else??)

I joined the Biggest Loser

2011-03-08T13:13:00.000-08:00

ok so for those that know me this statement above doesn't really make sense as I am not obese and need to loose 200lbs. or even 20, but I do have ~~10..~~ ok 15...I could take off. Every year my work does a 'Biggest loser challenge" where whomever can loose the highest percentage of weigh loss in 1 month wins money!!!! This year the pot is over 300$. I thought to myself... I will try, this is a good excuse and opportunity to take off some of that lingering baby weight that came off from the amazingness of Breastfeeding and then somehow got back on!! (appalled) So i weighed in and Tomorrow or Today I guess.. is DAY 1. I have been wanting to get more active and exercise, this is good for me. Motivation to get moving.. Last year the girl who won lost 8 lbs... doesn't seem like a lot to me.. Maybe I have been ruined from my addiction to the actual biggest loser... where 8 lbs is a good week, not month. i feel a bit bad b/c the people at work that really do need to loose weight should probably win this thing but I need it too and that's not to say I will win but I can work hard for it. if biggest loser has taught me anything is it is that I deserve it and and worth it .. I figure if I buckle down and kick my ass, I could loose 15lbs in a month.. (a little too hopeful maybe?) well I guess we will see..... wish me luck!

Inspirational People: Kyle Stewart

2011-03-08T06:14:00.000-08:00

Have you ever seen work that just stands out to you? Makes you really look, think & inspire you to create? I came across this artist a few years ago and came to my attention again at the recent Artists project Downtown Toronto. Kyle Stewart. His work just sucks me in!!! Just makes me want to stare at them all day. I love the movement and texture of his work, it really blows me away how detailed but expressionistic the lines are. Check out his stuff, awesome Canadian artists I hope you will be as engaged as I am.

www.kylestewart.ca

Number Two

2011-03-01T12:57:00.000-08:00

Lots of talk lately about #2’s. This got me thinking today, and I must admit these thought s have been swarming in mine and Luke’s mind… #2… Many people around me are thinking about #2, carrying # 2 or have just had their sweet little #2’s. (well some are the #3’s and #4’s but woah woah woah, let’s just focus on # 2 for now.) About a month ago, I had a great desire to have a baby in my belly again. Having someone to grow in there, take care of, that whole fantasy of a baby. But then reality sets in and wow 2 would be out 9 months later. 2!! And I’ve had a baby I know how smashed that dream is very quickly after birth, b/c new babies are hard!!! I read a friends blog today on # 2, about being ready or not being ready. Now I must admit and I am quite vocal about this (as is she) a baby is NOT EASY!! And 2 is wow. But I think or us we’ve reached a point of, if it happens we will be so happy, but I don’t think we are quite ready to try’ yet.. That said I never want the thought of it being too hard to take over. And maybe next time I’ll have a more positive outlook on a difficult baby b/c I’ve gone it once already.

This thought brings me back to labour, it looks impossible from the outside looking in but going into it positively, it sucked while it was going through it but it was manageable and I got through it.. I never wanted the thought of it being to hard to take over b/c the end result was the best. Here are some thoughts from that night...

Labour….

“The night is foggy, some parts stand out more than others. I remember counting the polka dots on the curtains during contractions. I remember trying to save face when another woman in labour was watching me have a contraction. I remember walking in the quietness of the hospital. I remember God’s presence with us. I remember Luke doing everything he could to help me, I remember his support, his drawing on my arms, cold cloths on my head, I remember back massages to relieve the pressure, I remember his encouraging words and soft voice. I remember it was tough, but doable with focus and a clear mind. I remember coaching our little baby to let Jesus show him the best way to get out. I remember Luke and I breathing together, dance together, walk together in the stillness, in the quietness of the hospital get through each contraction. I focus on opening up and staying relaxed, the more relaxed I am the easier my body can open up and do what it's suppose to. I give in to the process. I give in and let my body communicate to each other telling each other the next step in what to do.”

It seems that even though it’s hard, if you just give into the process it all becomes much easier. I have no control so let go. Maybe motherhood is also this way, we have no control, give into the process and try to make the most of it while it’s hard. .. in the end, it is well worth it, because there are moments like these…

“Pushing.. wow what a strange experience. It is such a relief at this point holding it is really hard, but man is it hard and exhausting! But something comes over you, this incredible strength, motivation, excitement to see your little one and you try your hardest to get them there, effort cries off the end of each push I take a breath and go for another, I worship, I squeek out the words to the songs between and during pushes I yell, COME ON JACK! I pray for help from papa.. Then after all that work, HOLD IT! Hold it!!?? I wait wait wait, the dr Jokes that the top of the baby's head is out so far they could stick a hat on it. Then one small push and "OW OW OW OW OW" I cry out loud, "DON'T STOP! IT'S THE SHOULDERS!" - WAIT THE SHOULDERS!!!?? WHEN DID HIS HEAD COME OUT??? But then all of a sudden the most beautiful moment, he is there, on my chest, my son. His face all scrunched up it is engraved in my brain. Squinty, puffy eyes and cute little face. I hold him and laugh and cry all at the same time. It is the most incredible, most overwhelming feeling I have ever felt. I look at Luke and we stare adoringly. We are a family. What a beautiful moment, the best day of my life.”

Through the shit, the hardest parts, birth the most beautiful life. So how can you not stare into that face of love and want another? # 2…. Not sure when, but I know it’s coming. Until then I’ll just wait and enjoy my wonderful # 1.

Tuesday Tips: Oil Pastels

2011-03-01T08:51:00.000-08:00

Tuesday Tips

So my wonderful Aunt who inspires me insanely and has since I was small has recently asked me about the pastels I use, that I like and my experience with them. After writing a massively long email, I was bummed when it deleted unexpectedly. I was going to write it again but have been recently thinking about this new blog and wanting to add some common weekly posts. A fellow friend and blogger does this and I love it, my favorite posts of hers “mama mondays’. I have decided to start up Feature Friday’s where I feature great talent that inspires me and have been trying to think of something clever for tips on art supplies techniques.. So I think Pastels are the first on the list of this.

Tuesday Tips…? Not as clever as I hoped but maybe it will do for now..

So lets get started

Hmm pastels.. this is my opinion and anyone can disagree or add to the conversation, this is just my own personal experience. I use oil pastels a lot in my art, mixing them with paint, thinning them out, blending smudging, accenting or just creating free flowing line with a different texture within a painting. Pastels can vary in their quality, from excellent ( smooth and buttery that glide across the page and blend perfectly), to a really crappy made pastel that is hard, almost like a crayon that doesn’t glide or blend as easily but creates a different, finer line with a different texture and then there is everything in between. I personally am not particular to any type of pastel. I like them all b/c for me they all have different ways they are used based on their softness and hardness. You can buy pastels from the dollar store, to Walmart, to art stores like deserres or curry’s and in my opinion it is worth trying them all. I mix my qualities, some 4 or 5$ a stick or some 5-100$ a pack. Three professional quality brands of oil pastel are Sennelier, Holbein, and Garich. Mungyo & VanGogh are student quality brands but surprisingly decent products. They glide nice, a medium softness and blend surprisingly well and they are relatively cheap about $10 – 15 for a pack of 25 – 40 different colours. But I do have a certain softness in my heart to a really well made pastel, with true pigments and high quality everything. if you have tried a really amazing quality pastel (easy to spot, usually sold individually, for a few dollars each) oh you will never go back. If you are looking for buttery softness and an amazing blend, these are worth it all the way. I tend to only buy certain colours of these, more for highlights and colours I want to have really beautiful vibrancy within a piece. Rembrants are incredible and $$$ but they’re a chalk pastel, we’ll talk about those another day.

Tuesday Tip: TRY THEM ALL!!! I experiment and buy different kinds all the time and you only learn by doing, trying!! See what’s best for you. Try different ones Use them any way you can think of. Turpentine waters them down and you can make them a liquid on paper. Lay 2 colours beside each other and smudge the middle to create a perfect blend. Layer them on top of each other. They can become a palatable mixture (and the more they are worked and heat up the creamier they get) or can use as a single stroke to create broken lines. Commonly layering is used with oil pastels but I mix them with my paints, use them as overlays, highlights or defining lines. There are no rules, so throw out any ideas you did have about them and get working!

One important thing to know is that oil pastels don’t ever dry so they need to be sprayed with a fixative, can be found at any art store, Krylon makes a good product and offers UV protection so that your colours don’t fade and fixative doesn’t over time, yellow.

Happy Experimenting!

for the love of art

2011-02-25T08:45:00.000-08:00

let me introduce myself...

My name is Heather Sinnott, I am a painter, I am a wife, a new mother, a teacher, a student.. i live in my own constant creative process, as it is my journey, living life in a mind full of ideas swarming, bursting inspiration, life and creativity in any form. I began painting seriously about 10 years ago and a graduate of the Honours Fine arts Program at Bishop's University in Lennoxville, Quebec. I graduated at the top of my class with distinction receiving awards of excellence for my studio work. Though proud of my accomplishments, I am humble about my work, it is honest, it is vulnerable, it is the story of my heart.

I love being an artist because I love to create, without it would feel incomplete. It is simply a part of me. When I paint my mind disconnects and my hands start to work, I enter into a space of stillness that feels in slow motion, like i have all the time in the world. When I paint I am connecting with the paint & canvas, connecting with my heart and God. For me it is a silent conversation of my heart because it is truly is a language that my heart understands clearly. Each stroke followed by another in a series of movements like a dance on canvas. In this place, there is freedom.

I tend to work in series, their medium and subject can vary and is completely open to whatever is expressed. Each completely different from the next from representational to abstract. I paint what my heart feels at that moment in time, what it is saying, what it is hearing or feeling. Some series are well thought out and planned, some are completely spontaneous in the moment of stillness and complete peace.

My journey has been wonderful, challenging, lots of work and at times easy and flowing and full of some great opportunities at others. We all hit road bumps or creative blocks or times where we just can't seem to paint it out, but we all grow, move forward and watch new buds grow and blossom on our trees of life. My work has shown all over and I have enjoyed it and am proud of everything I have done and still look forward to more. I can't wait to see what's next, pushing myself to constantly move forward, grow and experience new things and find opportunities to share my heart with those interested in the journey.

to check out my work visit

www.heathersinnott.com

this blog will be full of art, ramblings, things I love, things that inspire me, features, new work, shows, sales, all things art! Enjoy!

few new pieces

2011-02-22T18:07:00.000-08:00

i recently painted these pieces and never got a chance to post them.
i kinda really enjoy them.

'the piano player'
30" x 48"
acrylic

'bass player'
12" x 36"
acrylic and pastel

"woman with a flower in her hair"
20 x 30
acrylic

days that make you laugh...

2011-02-22T06:39:00.000-08:00

i woke up this morning bright and early, of course not as early as I had intended, I did let my alarm clock snooze 4 x... (give me grace it was 5:30 am) baby sleep'n I get ready for work, ohh curl'n my hair a bit, it's been a whole since I've done that... and just feel'n pretty, I put on a pretty shirt with great details, a pair of my favourite pinstripe pants, some cute balck flats some diamond studs and my new carlos albert (a faaaaabulous jelwery designer made by hand and even signed on each piece!! ahhhh filigree heart pendant that my honey bought for me for valentines day. All a nice change from my regular uniform of sweatpants and a t shirt

it was just a good morning, (minus no coffee upon first waking..) I get ready, little man wakes up on his own right on time! (I loove when that happens) luke gets together all of the lunches, also doubles up on Jack for us to leave the house by 7:15. Ugggh work days, drag us ALL out of bed so early but somehow we survive. little man was so happy this morning, every day seems to be more and more enjoyable. His little face staring at us and big round eye balls peering away, laughing, being sneaky, he is just suuch a good kid, smiles smiles smiles. he just makes my world go round :) photo credit: photosbytrayc

I have had a great weekend with Friends I haven't seen in ages, who I miss and love and some wonderful time family and my sweet little neice racing cars with my little man. Martin Smith did worship at our church and it was the deepest my heart has felt in along time. I left feeling good. I left being touched, feeling connected..

Sunday afternoon after having an excellent talk with the owner of Gallery Streetsville this weekend while dropping off my work for an upcoming show this week at Bistro Chezanne (from feb 22 - 25) I felt good, I felt inspired, I felt motivated. I started to rethink my business plan again, my future, the things I want, the things I really desire!! I realized I really want to make this art centre/gallery/big vision of many things thing happen!! and talking to her I realized, I could really do this.. All my ideas started to flood back, funny how I forget them all when I doubt myself. Since returning from Cabo my mind has been spinning with ideas, but since returning I've had a full plate, some commissions, one large, this show this week, an upcoming trade show and possible 2nd (a couple sales! wahoo!), filling a new space - so needing all new art!! , needing new pieces, writing lessons for a 2 day workshop I am doing in June and designing a book all with deadlines!! has made my own desires put on pause. Which is not good, I just need to manage my time well and I can get it all done.but I am excited! I am feeling productive and want to see where this all goes. I am feeling more and more like me again. I am so driven and focused usually, the past year has felt a bit airy and loose which has been a nice change but I have missed ME!! the driven, motivated me who can conquer anything in my mind... i have felt weak this year, doubtful, transition into mommyhood has been tough and i have been worried about life, art, my business what it will all become.. if anything.. but I feel hopeful and excited! a much needed change and i am reminded of what God told me a few months back, ' though you watch the trees around you grow tall and bear fruit, your harvest is well worth the wait'

as i sit at my desk, my mind is in this spinning full and busy state, thinking, moving going I drift back into reality when I dump an entire cup of cold coffee in my lap. HA! I laugh right out loud, I cannot help it. completely soaked I feel full of life. its been a while since I felt this way. I feel rested though I'm tired and have thrown my back out, i am still smiling though my crotch is full of cold hazelnut coffee. Its a good day. It's going to be a good season. the sun is shining, the warmth will get here soon, I love the days that just make you laugh. (and sweet, my Tim's coffee was a roll up the rim winner) thanks Papa.

la la la la la means I love you.

2011-02-15T19:49:00.000-08:00

www.photosbytrayc.ca

just so you know little guy.. you are the best thing that ever happened to your daddy & me.

Just like paris... in the heart of Streetsville

2011-02-15T12:57:00.000-08:00

Check out this new and delicious restaurant Bistro Chezanne nestled into the cozy core of downtown Streetsville. A couple of my paintings will be showing as part of the "Indulge your senses" show displaying February 23 - 25th. Come enjoy some art, wine and some yummy french food. C'est magnifique!

ahhhh vacation

2011-01-28T12:34:00.000-08:00

Ahhhh vacation. How I love thee. Here is what I get to look forward to next week. Beauuutiful palacial vacation, really spoiled fancy resort. Nothing quite like it. I am looking forward to the warmth of the sun beating down on my skin... Here I come Los Cabo san Lucas.

the famous "elephant rock" (well that's what we call it. You know the movie The count of Monte Cristo? and the greaaaat scenes that take place on this spectacular natural sceneery. Oh yah that's the place. Simply gorgeous.

award winning infinity pools.

beautiful gardens. yah this place is great. It will be our 2nd time there, and it couldn't have come at a better time. We soooo need a vacation. Between full time working, new baby and my husband doing his masters, we are burnt. so we decided time to get burt in a different way and escape this horrible cold and go to Mexico. A wonderful Christmas present from Luke's parents complete with BOTH sets of grandparents and our little 1 year old Jack. It should be a wonderful family vacation full of sun, sand, exploring, laughs, rest, mexican food and margaritas.

be inspired.

2011-01-24T08:17:00.000-08:00

After a busy season of being with baby, I am back to work part time and still painting away. I must say I love commissions. I love creating something for someone and really putting in the time that i know they will appriciate. I love to see their face when they see it, eyes light up like wow it's mine! There is importance in the details I think. Taking the time to make something right. There are times of complete expression and explosion but there are also quiet moments where you can spend hours on the smalles details. A current piece I am working on a commission of my famous "woman in the red dress" is all about the layers. I spend hours and hours of washes and layering, combinig colours to create the right softeness but vibrancy and visual drama to a piece. So I guess i am back to process.

God recently brought to my attention some oppertunities. Some teaching! and oppertunities to show, be exposed and feaured! (whaoo, more later on these) but it reminded me that His process for things is so that we will be ready and prepared and really understand the details he has really painted into my life. Customizing them for me, the details that I will really appriciate. If it were up to us our timing woul dbe all off and probably quite the disaster. This reminder that he is still taking care of things, knows my heart and that I am not forgotten got me inspired again.

Inspiration... well there are some people that have really inspired me and becuase of them I am launching 'the Hope project' this year, and I hope a second 'the love project' (if not this year, the love project will be next year). I want to raise money for some awesome causes/ministries becuase I really believe in what they do. I will be looking for artists and people to help out to make it happen. Art for the Heart will be joining in to put together an art show to sell works to raise money, if you are interested send me a message! It is still in the beginning stages but I am gathering a team, but I am starting from scratch, I need people and to find a space, there's lots to do but I am inspired, I am modivated and so excited to see it all come together.

How good is His process. From layers of paint, to layers of my heart. Yeaah Papa, so excited to see what more is to come.

look at that face!

2011-01-22T18:32:00.001-08:00

Haaaapppy Birthday Little man! Today we had his Birthday Party with some friends and grandparents. it was so cute to watch him walk around where ever he went with helium balloons in hand and little its my birthday crown. ITS YOUR DAY BUDDY! So the 1st "smash the cake" didn't go so well... the one on one in front of studio lights where we thought he would curiously explore, but instead cried :( yet still got some great shots. but Today, this was a hit! My homemade, sugar free, baby cake, with real cream cheese icing.. HE LOVED IT! not sure at first, he took his time but dove in after about 5 min of all 20 of us standing and watching, he handfulled it in while my wonderful friend Trayc snapped away capturing this wonderful moment. Silly boy! Happy Birthday my little one year old! Mommy and Daddy Love you SOOOOOO MUCH!!!!

LITTLE MAN IS 1!!!!

2011-01-20T17:12:00.000-08:00

Oh my goodness!! Where did the time go??
MY LITTLE BOY IS ONE!!!!!! How is that possible!!?
Little man, you are my pride and joy, my sweet little guy. Your new thing this month... you shake your head no and YOU WALK! Stepping since 9 months you decided about a week ago to give up the crawling and walking is your new form of transportation. You are the greatest! what a great year it has been.

the start.. 5 hours old, welcome to our family.
photosbytrayc.ca

6 days old: seriously cute, we put you in a bowl, on a bass, so many creative little spots
photosbytrayc.ca

3 weeks old: our first family shoot, we have staring contests every day and conversations with our eyes.
photosbytrayc.ca

1 month old: I thought you were so big! but look you are still so tiny
photosbytrayc.ca

2 months old: super jack! you are growing so quickly!!
photosbytrayc.ca

3 months old: after a silly shoot you sleep. our little cherubim

photosbytrayc.ca

6 months old: today you start leaning how to crawl, this is a classic jack face.
michaelsteingard photography

7 months old: now you crawl like a pro and you are hilarious!
photosbytrayc.ca

9 months old: Autumn shoot with the Dupley Clan. It was a beautiful Day. You are a very happy baby and getting sillier and sillier every day.
photosbytrayc.ca

10 months old: Getting ready for Christmas and our Christmas Cards. You have such a gentle, sweet spirit.
photosbytrayc.ca

11 months old: Boxing Day, family with the Steingards. Again, our silly boy, soo much personality with this kid.
michael steingard photography

12 months old: Your 1st Birthday!!! what a joy you are to have in our life :)
photosbytrayc.ca

something along the horizon.

2011-01-19T11:44:00.000-08:00

i woke up this morning to new things on the horizon. the light peeking up in what seems to have been a dark night for quite some time. Dusk... one of the most beautiful times of the day, GOOOOOOD MOORRRRRNIIIIIIINNNNGGGGG SUUUUUUNNNNN!!!! I welcome you, its on the rise, I look forward to beautiful sun shiny day.

creative process

2011-01-16T17:40:00.000-08:00

its been almost a year now, wow no, almost 2 years my brain seems... stuck..
I am working on lots of commissions and able to create pieces existing collections but I am waiting.. waiting for the next, thing.. the next collection, the next step in my growth as an artist and in myself. but I guess it is all part of the process, something that God is doing in me, preparing in me getting ready to release me into the next step. but this is my creative process... Perhaps this is HIS creative process b/c he is doing something great in me.

RANDOM BREAK IN THOUGHT...

[I had a dream a few months back, all I see is my feet wearing new running shoes, jogging on the concrete. Luke's are right beside mine. We are happy, we are doing it together, and we aren't getting tired. We are not running away from anything, just running and enjoying it.. "To dream that you are running in a marathon, represents life's journey and how you are performing or feeling. It is symbolic of your endurance and willpower. " i love this, and it feels right. I don't know if we are running a marathon in the dream but we are running modivated, happy, running a great distance. It makes me wonder what is in store for us. for our little family.. for our life, our buisness ventures... Starting the company this year really got me modivated to do some things I have had dreams for. I have talked about this before, but my pot of dreams has been stirred again and I am building up the confidence not to run away but to jump forward, BOLDLY!! I am set up, the company is registerred, the bank accounts are in order, and my first cheque has come in!! I was so excited to put it in the bank. My first cheque as a buisness owner. I bless that (small) cheque to multiply. this is only the beginning. I bless our finances and loosen blessing over them. I bless my buisness to grow and grow and grow and produce an abundance of good fruit. We are running at a steady pace without getting tired. Sounds great! ]

our creative processes are different from each others. I don't usually sit on ideas, I see a picture and I paint it, or in a burst of inspiration and I draw out 5 canvases at 4am, or paint and paint and paint untill my heart can't anymore, you get the idea.. I am exhausted emotionally and physically after, but it's prayer for me, it's worship, its everything inside of me bursting out like vomit, fast, violent, splattering everywhere (then I can step back and take it all in, and see what I ate that day.. haha grosse) Results are often quite sponateous and finished in one session of painting, that can last as short 1 -3 hours or as long as 2 or 3 days or suddenly months of producing one after another, sometimes up to 20 or more pieces in a row... i produce quickly, but the process can take months stirring in my belly and in my heart. Choosing a canvas, prepping it, finding imagery the exact angles I want or photographing my ideas, cutting and pasting, drawing, or choosing paints, papers, pastels. the colours, or only seeing pieces of the painting.. waiting to see more, the textures, they have all been placed in my heart, stirring in my heart. I get vision, impressions, pictures, words, they all marinate and I spend the time in worship before I even know what I am painting, before God shows me the whole picture (and soemtimes I don't even know!! then.. I feel it, I just know, its time to paint!). my whole life and mind is consumed in the creative process.

A few months back God showed me a picture of a filing cabinet being filled at highspeed, I believe he was downloading pictures into my cabinet, filing them in my heart to pull out one by one for him to show me, share with me and bless others.

I have been having a hard time lately with the lack of production, WHY can't I paint for myself, WHY am I allowing things to get all bottled up in there? maybe I just need to remmber and know that it is just in the middle of a process and my impatience, my misunderstanding and frustration is teaching me a whole lot more than I know. For the first time in months I am getting gimps' of pictures and seeing my hands at work, there are no brushes, I am working with my hands, I am feeling, I am moving, I am connecting. This next piece/collection? I know will be different, I don't know how but it has to do with time, painting might not be in one session. I think this one is alot of time because it's all about reconnecting. Connecting again with myself, connecting physically with my hands to my painting, my art, my creativity and God.

RANDOM BREAK IN THOUGHT

[I am reminded of a word I was given when a woman was praying for me recently, or a picture I guess she saw. She saw that my "well" had been being dug for a long time, (YES ACCURATE!!! YEARS!) and that it's becuase it isn't a well, it is a resevoir, so long, and wide a deep. It has taken so long, b/c it is so vast. there was more to the word, I'm sure it will come to me later but I guess I am only remembering this part right now b/c digging my resevoir is apart of my process. part of my process with God and part of my process in myself, and my art. My art has felt like a dried up well... but maybe its not, maybe it has undergone 2 years of being dug, perhaps it is also a resevoir, creativity to be filled in abundance, overflowing, and God will use it to feed the thirsty, fill their bellies and their souls. ]

hmm i think thats good to end on. Jesus use me. fill my resevoir in your timing let it pour out over people with ease and grace.

2011-01-11T12:50:00.000-08:00

this was our christmas card this year. OOOOOhhhh man. what a cutie. photo take by the onederful Trayc at photosbytrayc.ca

It has been a great year 2010. A complete change and challenge but wow, what a love. Our growing little family is so wonderful. Can hardly wait to add more little ones... (well maybe I can wait a little, heehee)

2011-01-06T10:27:00.001-08:00

i want to grow...

i want to take pictures that take your breath away.
i want to learn how to play the guitar
i want to worship my ass off without limits
i want to paint with boldness
i want my spirit to dance again
i want to reconnect,
with myself,
with my art,
with my God....
i want to really know His love.
His goodness.
His grace.

i surrender. all of my dreams, every part of me.

Focus fear and Failure

2011-01-05T19:16:00.000-08:00

motivation, focus, fear. STOP

what is wrong with this cycle.

it doesn't seem like it should be one but for me it goes round and round.

I get motivated, I paint, I research I write, I being to focus understand exactly what I want, set is all up to go for it them BAM. I Skye myself out I get scared, self conscious and I stop. It seems te next step the follows fear is a dead stop and into depression and beating myself up that i just won't be good enough. Time goes by and I get motivated again, but the whole cycle keeps going. So how do I break this? How do I move forward?

I think part of the problem is that as soon as I try something or want to try something, someone else does it before me and simultaneously and then deflated I just let it go like what's the point? I try to be strong, I try to trust that God has purpose and plans and that every door closes for a reason. But what about the ones that are wide open and i just don't have the balls to walk through myself. The ones That I let others walk through while i have been sitting on the stoop for ages.. allowing fear to keep me from taking the next step through.

I am terrified of failure. And I think I avoid opportunity that I know i will be great at b/c I'm afraid I might fail.

i can hear 'you are more than a conqueror' then reminded of a friends words ' hoods up glocks out' i must admit I had to look this up to know what it meant but it makes me smile - it is so fitting. We are more that conquers. I am ready to take it by storm. at least i want to believe I am. I want to be strong again. I'm so tired of this cycle, so tired of getting ready then backing down like a shamed dog. I'm tired of being intimidated, I'm tired of allowing others trample out my hope, my heart my visions and dreams. Each persons creativity is unique and special. God has purpose for mine. It's time i start believing that. I need to focus. remember what I want, what i love. and stop allowing myself to be stolen from. hoods up glocks out. I'm gearing up. It has been such a long season of preparation. they won't know what hit them.

hoods up, glocks out

2011-01-04T17:41:00.000-08:00

"hoods up, glocks out... that's how i'm man handling this new year. kickin' ass and taking names."
well said yana....

Lets take it by storm.

2011-01-04T14:11:00.000-08:00

just think'n about how great this little guy is..

First day back

2011-01-04T11:30:00.000-08:00

well it is my first day back... i'm not really sure what to think of it. As I sit here writing this, I am staring out a massive wall of windows in the really beautiful office I work in, surrounded by a massive marble desk and friendly'esk faces. A job that has been really worked around what I would like. I have enjoyed smiling and helping people and doing simple stress free tasks, but still I am still sad.. I would rather be home with my babe, chasing around that silly little man full of giggles and smiles.

mommies that work full time, how do you do it?

My little part time job is even painful for me.

I haven't yet had a cry, he is with Grandma and Grandpa today, I know he is safe and having a silly time. Which I think will be an easier transition. I'm not sure if for me or him but it will be easier. but what about when he goes to someone less familar? This is a hard thought for me. What if he is scared, or feels abandon during nap time, his mommy not there to snuggle him when he cries?

ohhh I am killing myself here, I have to stop.

back to work... it's only 2 days a week, and a 3rd every other but it's still hard. I miss my little man.

Dream without Fear, Love without Limits

2011-01-02T20:17:00.000-08:00

the ongoing quest to conquer clutter

2010-12-30T08:55:00.000-08:00

it's been a while since I was on this subject and seeing after Christmas our house suddenly collected more stuff and i am feeling so stuffed to the brim in this house I am ready to throw everything out or move. Seeing as moving is quite in the cards Just yet, I am yet again on the quest to conquer the clutter in my house, (and in my heart).

Things that come to mind are these 4 boxes 2 in the basement, 2 in the upstairs closet, they are full of winter stuff... mitts, hats, scarves, boots from when we lived in the mountains in quebec, everyday we would bundle ourselves up for the - 40degree treck to school. it was useful then but comeon' we live in Brampton, it's not exaclty that cold here... and seeing as I use the same pair of mitts everyday with the exception to my snowboarding gloves I think its time to donate them all to the homeless. I'm sure they could really use them this cold winter.

The second that comes to mind is the endless piles of clothes, the constant flow of laundry. I have recently dumped 5 garbage bags of clothes.. and there are still too many. Yesterday I tackled the linen closet, threw out the crap. and reorganized, it looks beautiful.

Closets and junk drawers... there are many messy, unorganized closets and drawers in this house and they all seem to go unnoticed. Many things that don't really have a place but get thrown in or tucked away into the abyss of mess never to be seen again. I love a beautifully organized closet. I look in Lukes and it is perfect, dressshirts all lined up perfectly hanging, suits (well sportsjackets) , ties, pants, sweaters, perfect - even down to his shoes all neatly lined up in a row. Then comes to mine, and every other closet - excluding the new organized linen closet - ABSOLUTE CHAOS... It seems I always overlook them becuse they seem like such a big job, I think.. no I KNOW this goes for the many 'junk drawers' i have also collected in nearly every room.. I think this is perhaps fear.. fear that keeps me from cleaning them all out.. becuase God uses such practicality to talk to me i'm afraid about what he might tell me a lot about in my own closets and junk drawers and do a deep cleaning and pitching out the trash that has collected. but i guess perhaps, after a season of cleaning, then rest... it is time to get back to some cleaning, organizing and simplifying in my own heart and life.

Lately something in me doesn't feel quite right. I think it is a mixture of my little babe getting so big, (he is walking now!) pregnancy hormones finally being gone and not being on the pill for the first time in 10 years, my hormones are going insane trying to figure out where they belong, my husbands job is quite stressful on him and he is doing his MBA right now which can get crazy, me going back to work in less than a week and something not feeling quite right in me, not settled, not happy.. I'm not sure exactly what but i have definitely been neglecting the work it out with God part of things. my heart has been battling with some ongoing stuff this year, well Luke and both have. A big part of me just wants to get up and move away, move on, never to look back. I know that isn't the right thing to do that's just like putting all the little things i have thrown in my junk drawers and closets but at the same time, I'm not really sure what to do with any of it. mm.. yah....anyways

Someone said to me this year it is a season of exposure, God has been doing a wonderful job at cleaning out my clutter. Though like my house main spaces are clear i think there are are many hidden spots still packed with juNK. Maybe its time to get to it.

Happy 11 months!!!

2010-12-20T17:22:00.000-08:00

oh my goodness, my little man is 11 months! where did the time go!!??

He is the silliest, happiest, most curious baby you will ever meet. He loves to laugh, and be chased around the house. He loves to read and talk and explore, you can often find him getting into something, like shredding newspapers, chasing the dog, playing in the dog bowl, throwing things in the toilet and trying to flush them down, pulling all the toilet paper off the roll and squealing in delight or just simply pulling out every item from his toyboy, or the cd cupboard, or dish cupboard or fridge. One word to describe him... BUSY!!! you are always smashing or hitting something, making noise any way possible. You think the washing machine and drier are fascinating, and always want to be apart of everything! You know how to HIGH FIVE! you are a great mimic of nearly everything. You are already babbling your own little language all of the time and know some of our words too! You say bUh baaa and wave which is super cute! and words like mama, dada, baba (bottle) , buh (book), buuh baa (bye bye), Ho Ho Ho and sing OOOOOOOOOooooo and LALLALALALA. Screaming is a great new hobby then laughing when it echos through the kitchen.

You have 8, count em' 8 TEETH!!! and 2 more Eye teeth on the way! Mommy and Daddy are impressed by your walking! You can do 5 steps on your own now but cruise everything in site at a see and can just stand on your own with out even trying to balance for ages, it is incredible. You are so strong and can do squats 100 time better than mommy could ever even try! You climb the stairs and do anything you can to get higher! like push your toys or the diaper bag against things to climb to the next level and most recently I foudn you hanging off the baby gate!! YOU MONKEY. It is hilarious! You can even escape your highchair with some amazing acrobatics. We think you are a little smartiepants and the cutest little boy we've ever seen..

Little guy you make mommy and daddy smile everyday you snuggle the best, you laugh the best, you bring us so much joy. Happy 11 months!

GATE 403

2010-12-06T14:21:00.000-08:00

Well I made it.. My work is hung, and it looks great! Check it out if you get a chance to, have a drink and enjoy some great art and music. Gate 403 Rocancesvale Ave, Toronto. I will be having an informal meet and greet/opening from 5 - 8pm on Sunday. December 12th. The display will be up until January 2nd, 2011, hope to see you all there.

His Great Love

2010-11-27T22:04:00.000-08:00

i haven't been blogging the past couple days.. I really been pouring all of my spare timei into painting. Coming up this space at GATE 403 I suprised myself at the amount of space there is and am doubting how much work I really have.. Soo... that leaves me painting like a mad woman. Which of course means lots of time talking to God as paintings emerge before me. Funny when I paint, I really don't think much about what I am doing, I just paint and talk to God, hours pass and there is a painting infront of me. I am always suprised as a resolution to something or conclusion or just the finishing of a conversation comes to a close, so does the piece.

Last night I found myself working furiously for hours, and found myself painting myself into a very in a very angry place, an incident that happened nearly 4 years ago now. God has been speaking to me about exposure. Bringing light to all the dark areas, pulling the crap out of my closets, cleaning the floors and dusting (see earlier blogs.) So last night here I stand, covered in paint, in my basement angry, yelling at this person who hurt me, pouring my whole heart into saying all the things I want to say, the things I hold back. I am mad at myself for being vulnerable, for allowing myself to be in such a position and How changed i am because of it. I stop.. I realize what I am doing and I sound like a crazy person. Tears streaming down my face can't believe how upset i am... It was so long ago. I had no idea this was so strong inside of me but painting has brought me into this place. It is a place of the unconcious, a place of vulnerability, a place where healing happens. I step back and look at this hurt girl sitting before me, Jesus where were you? He shows me.

I cry at the thought of this.. what an amazing moment. Afraid, last night I think I leave this thought, this place and move onto something else pretty quickly but I return to it today perhaps ready to listen, ready to believe truth... I know that that is Him pursuing me with His love. There is never a moment where He stops pursuing you with His Love. Even when we are afraid, even when we are hurt, have been hurt he was there, you just have to ask him, picture the moment of pain, the room, the place, run it like a movie, and ask Jesus where are you? Look around the room in that space of pain, He will show you and just wait. for me he was sitting on there stairs watching, then walked over and held me, & shielded me. He will show you where He is and reveal His Heart, the truth to you. In all of this i am still sitting, learning but i know Jesus has incredible revelations for us and wants to keep pulling the crap out from under the beds. This is a season of exposure. I think that creates a season of healing. Healing hearts, minds, bodies which really is pretty exciting.

I'm not even sure why I write this. Maybe just to get it out. maybe just to say that there is hope for healing. maybe just a demonstration the power of painting/creating and that God uses everything and has great big plans for each of us and it is His heart to just love us.

2010-11-25T11:37:00.000-08:00

ohhh it has been a morning of exhaustion, dr's appt, driving around like busy bees. Little man went down for a nap and as soon as he did I bolted to the kitchen to clean the whole thing top to bottom as it seems a bomb went off in there and the rest of the house for that matter. So for 2 hours I cleaned that kitchen, did the dishes, mopped the floor, cleaned all the bottles and got ready for jacks lunch. Lunch turned into a fight, this little guy seems to resist food every chance he gets the past few days (very unlike him, b/c he is a great eater). Being a grumpy rump I clean up lunch, put him down to the floor b/c he is freaking in his highchair, he takes a big D and is a happy dude all over again. While I continue on my way cleaning up all around I pick up the bowl of spaghetti he barely touched, i slip.... and I see it all in slow motion, the bowl slips out of my finger and flies through the air landing on the floor, and splattering tomato sauce and tiny bits of Baby sized pasta all over my clean kitchen. arrrg!!

busy bee 2011

2010-11-22T16:11:00.000-08:00

ahhh seems I am back to myself, pushing full speed ahead, wanting more!! I am already planning 2011. Hunting down art shows, venues, stores, oppertunities!! At the same time i can't but think if I am nuts?? I feel sooo strongly this year to pay it forward. Give back. I want to donate, start fundraisers, be involved! I will be involved so far with 3 auctions to raise money for different causes. And so far I also have booked 1 art festival, 1 solo show, lots of live painting, hopefully some teaching and currently putting together proposals for a couple major shows i'd REALLY like to be accepted into. I don't want to overbook myself and go crazy like i have other years, (in the past I did 26 venues in one year! ugggh so tiring!) But I want to be out there again! I want to be involved and i am motivated. So here I continue booking, organizing, researching, writing lesson plans and whats on my heart. I have a good feeling about this year.. i guess we'll just see.

Solo Show @ Gate 403

2010-11-18T18:26:00.000-08:00

I booked this nearly a year ago and I thought it kinda fell through the cracks. But to my surprise it didn't! i will be showing a solo show at Gate 403 (located at 403 Roncesvalles Avenue, Toronto) for the month of December. It is an upper scale piano bar close to High Park. I was pretty excited to have a venue so excited about my work and book me only days after sending them my work. The lady said 'where did you come from!?' this is always nice to hear!! The have requested my Jazz series, seeing as they are a Jazz bar. I am hoping for some good feedback and maybe some sales!
If you are in the area, check it out! My work will be there from December 1 - January 3rd.

What's in a name?

2010-11-12T13:14:00.000-08:00

I had a lovely friend Sheri ask what does my new company greenpear creative mean? Hmm i must admit, it is a name that has been in my heart for a while. I never really thought about what it meant. But as I do believe God has purpose for EVERYTHING I started to ask. What does this mean? Instantly I got the words Growth, journey, GOOD fruit. and saw a picture of my grandmothers backyard and the delicious pear trees we soooo enjoy.

Pear - A pear, down to the shape, I see as the shape of a pregnant woman, pregnant with new gifts, maternal, bountiful, birthing new life, new creative ideas.

a pear..

a pregnant woman, see pretty close!

A pear, my favourite fruit, I could eat these all day if I had a chance. The tree, the pear tree is a low hanging tree, easy to access, and to enjoy for everyone and live a very long time!

and of course Ahhh my grandma's pear tree... (again, God giving me object lessons) They are tall, not huge but reap an incredible harvest (with age they will grow and grow and grow!) Every year, we we wait patiently watching these pears grow, and the tree get taller, as everything else came into season, the pear was a bit later but my goodness, it was worth it!! It would grow these delicious, chubby pears, full of flavour, vibrant colour and were used for everything! eaten fresh, made with jams and canning, spread to our family, our friends, The trees would overflow with incredible fruit.

Green is the color of nature . It symbolizes growth, harmony, freshness, and fertility. Green has great healing power. It is the most restful color for the human eye; it can improve vision. Green suggests stability and endurance. Green indicates growth and hope. Green, has strong emotional correspondence with safety and it is the color of free passage in road traffic. (meaning GO! walk boldly!) Olive green is the traditional color of peace.

I want to be a person, and a company i want all f this!! and one that is full, ripe, delicious, and produces an abundance of great fruit. I want to be used for everything, shared with everyone, and used for many different things. I want to create opportunity, community and walk boldly in His calling for me. That doesn't just mean painting. Creative - is to cover all of the basis really, i don't want to be boxed by one word, but use one that expresses all of me and everything I want and desire to do. I want to create without borders with an overflow of fresh, peaceful, good fruit.

greenpear creative... what's in a name... a lot more than we originally see.

the birth of THE GREENPEAR!!

2010-11-12T08:18:00.000-08:00

oooo aaaahhh look at me I feel so grown up.

It is official, I am a BUISNESS OWNER! hah i know it is silly b/c all it is is registering a name but still... but it is a new chapter, and that quite exciting for me! I have lots of ideas, lots of things I want to do,
and.. it's just the beginning!